Aw, Phooey! An American Pope? What in the World is Going On Here?

What in the Name of Corn is Going On?!

Well blow me down! It seems there's a new Pope in town and get this – he's an American! Can you believe it? An American! They're calling him Pope Leo XIV. Who knew they made Popes stateside? I thought they only made 'em in uh where was it? That place with all the fancy hats and singing. Anyway this whole thing has got me quacking up a storm!

Trump's Truth… Or is it a Tall Tale?!

That old… uh… gentleman Donald Trump he's all excited about it. 'It is such an honor to realize that he is the first American Pope,' he yammered on his Truth Social thingy. 'What excitement and what a Great Honor for our Country!' He even wants to meet the guy! I bet he'll be saying 'Aw nuts!' when he finds out what's coming.

Pope Leo XIV's Got a Bone to Pick!

But here's the kicker folks! Seems like this new Pope isn't exactly Trump's biggest fan. Not one bit! According to some tweet tweet thingies Pope Leo XIV back when he was just plain old Prevost was calling out Trump and his pals. Apparently he wasn't too thrilled with the whole 'mass deportation' thing. 'Do you not see the suffering? Is your conscience not disturbed? How can you stay quiet?' he tweeted in a tweet. Oh boy oh boy oh boy!

From Funeral to Funny Business

And get this! After going to the funeral of the old Pope this Donald guy jokes about wanting to be Pope himself! Then he posts a picture of himself dressed up as the Pope that was made with some 'artificial intelligence' which sounds pretty fishy to me. What a character!

Holy Smoke! White Smoke!

The news came after some cardinals got together in Vatican City to pick someone to take over after Pope Francis… uh… flew the coop so to speak. When they finally picked Prevost they let everyone know by puffing out white smoke from a chimney. White smoke! What a quack tastic way to announce it!

So What's the Bottom Line Folks?

Well there you have it folks! The first American Pope is here and he might be giving some people a run for their money. This is going to be one hullabaloo of a Papacy! As for me I'm gonna go hide under my hat! Aw phooey!