Tesla Stock Goes Down the Toilet! Is This the End of the Line for Elon's Ride?!

Eat My Shorts Stock Market!

Hey hey what's up dudes and dudettes? Bart Simpson here reporting live from… well my treehouse. Turns out even *I* can't escape the grown up world of stocks and stuff. So Tesla right? One minute it's cruisin' high next minute it's crashin' harder than Milhouse on a sugar rush. Yesterday the stock jumped like crazy but today? Woof! It tanked like Sideshow Bob falling into a pile of rakes. 7.3% down! That's worse than getting detention from Skinner... again!

Trump's Tariff Tantrums!

Apparently this whole mess is because of President Trump and his 'trade wars.' He's slapping tariffs on everyone like he's trying to give the world a wedgie. He was gonna pause the tariffs for 90 days but then China's tariff rate went way up. It's a total 'Cowabunga dude!' moment. Now the analysts are all saying Tesla's gonna have a hard time making money 'cause they get their parts from all over the place. I guess that's a problem even Bart Simpson doesn't have.

Elon's in Trouble!

Speaking of grown up problems Elon Musk the big cheese at Tesla is catching heat! First off he's one of Trump's buddies so they're saying Tesla's in trouble. On top of that sales are slumping in Europe. Maybe everyone's finally realized that driving electric cars doesn't make you cool just… quiet.

Musk vs. the Moron!

Musk is also busy getting into Twitter fights with some guy called Peter Navarro. Apparently he called him a 'moron' and 'dumber than a sack of bricks.' I've said worse about Principal Skinner! But hey at least Musk is standing up for himself even if he's doing it like a grumpy old man on the internet. Eat my shorts Peter Navarro!

Short Sellers Strike Back!

And who's laughing all the way to the bank? The short sellers! These are the guys who bet that Tesla's stock will go down. They got burned yesterday but today they're probably doing the Bartman dance. Serves 'em right for being such nerds. But hey at least someone's making money right? I could use a few bucks myself. Maybe I should invest in… comic books!

Don't Have a Cow Man!

So what's the bottom line? Tesla's stock is on a roller coaster thanks to Trump's tariffs Musk's antics and maybe just plain bad luck. Will Tesla survive? Will Elon Musk ever stop tweeting? Will I ever get a decent grade in Mrs. Krabappel's class? Only time will tell! Until then don't have a cow man. Just sit back grab a Krusty Burger and enjoy the show.