Eat My Shorts, SCOTUS! Trump's Birthright Brouhaha Goes to Court!

Ay Caramba! Trump's at It Again!

Alright dudes and dudettes Bart Simpson here reporting live from… well my couch but still! President Trump is back on his birthright citizenship kick. Apparently he thinks folks are just vacationing here to pop out babies and become Americans all while laughing at us 'suckers.' As if! Doesn't he have like a golf course to yell at or something? Seriously can someone say 'eat my shorts' to this guy?

Fourteenth Amendment? More Like Fourteenth Annoyment According to Trump!

So Trump's saying the 14th Amendment which is supposed to give citizenship to anyone born here was only meant for the kids of former slaves. He thinks it has 'nothing to do with Illegal Immigration for people wanting to SCAM our Country.' SCAM! As if! I've pulled bigger scams than that on Principal Skinner and I'm just a ten year old! I once convinced Springfield Elementary that Milhouse was an exchange student from a made up country by the way.

Supreme Court Shenanigans: Not About the Big Question?!

Here's the kicker man. The Supreme Court ain't even gonna decide if Trump's birthright thing is legal right now. What?! They're just arguing about whether judges can block his orders nationwide. It's like when I get detention for a prank and then try to argue about the quality of the chalkboard erasers. Doh! But what about the juicy stuff?

Judges Gone Wild: Blocking Trump's Orders Like It's Their Job

So these judges right? They're blocking Trump's order left and right saying it's a load of hooey. Twenty something states a bunch of pregnant non citizens and some immigrant groups are all suing him. And the judges are like 'Nope not on my watch!' It's kinda like when Lisa tries to stop me from pulling pranks but on a much bigger much more important scale. I'd pay to see this court case!

Appeals Courts Say 'Simpsons Did It!'...Again!

Three appeals courts have mostly upheld the orders blocking Trump's thing. They are saying that Trump's plan is worse than when I replaced all the cafeteria food with liver and onions. Now they are heroes and I'm the bad guy! 'It wasn't me!' as Krusty would say.

Stay Tuned Dudes! This Ain't Over 'Til It's Over!

This is developing news man. Which means it's probably gonna get even weirder. Check back later for more updates. Maybe I'll even pull a prank on the Supreme Court while I'm at it. Anyone got any itching powder or stink bombs? Heh heh heh!