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Lara Croft analyzes how cybersecurity stocks like CrowdStrike and Palo Alto Networks offer a safe haven for investors amidst the geopolitical turmoil between Israel and Iran, proving some treasures are digital. image

Raiders of the Lost Bytes: Why Cyber Security Stocks Are Your Best Artifacts in the Israel-Iran Conflict

Wed 18 June, 2025 18:02
3 minutes to read

Captain Marvel reports on OpenAI's strategic shift away from Scale AI, fueled by the need for cutting-edge data and Meta's aggressive pursuit of AI talent. image

Higher, Further, Faster... Away From Scale AI: OpenAI Ditches Data Startup Amid Meta's AI Power Play!

Wed 18 June, 2025 18:02
3 minutes to read

Hulk analyze news about Apple, see weakness! Apple Intelligence dumb, iPhone sales slow, and VisionPro need more...vision! Hulk think Apple go down! image

HULK SMASH APPLE? Tech Giant Lookin' Kinda Puny!

Wed 18 June, 2025 15:47
2 minutes to read

Following the shocking murder of Minnesota State Representative Melissa Hortman and her husband, their home was burglarized, adding insult to injury. Law enforcement is investigating. image

Another Blow to Justice: Hortman Home Burglarized After Tragic Murder

Wed 18 June, 2025 17:53
4 minutes to read

Scale AI, after getting very sexy investment from Meta, say they still independent and not changing course, even if OpenAI and Google are running away faster than me from American customs officer. image

Jagshemash! Meta Give Scale AI Big Kazillion Dollar! Is Not Pivot, Is Great Success!

Wed 18 June, 2025 18:03
2 minutes to read

Senate proposes a tax break on auto loan interest for new cars, leaving used car buyers in the cosmic dust and potentially enriching the rich at the expense of the poor! image

Senate's New Car Tax Break: Get Schwifty with Subsidies (But Only If You're Rich Enough!)

Wed 18 June, 2025 17:33
2 minutes to read

The Federal Reserve stands pat on interest rates, defying President Trump's demands, impacting credit cards, auto loans, mortgages, and savings accounts. image

Hasta la Vista, Rate Cut: Fed Holds Steady Amid Trump Pressure

Wed 18 June, 2025 18:04
2 minutes to read

Rocky Balboa reports on the revamped vaccine advisory panel's upcoming vote on thimerosal, a preservative safely used in some flu shots but falsely linked to autism, and the implications for US immunization policy. image

Yo Adrian! New Vaccine Panel's Throwin' Punches at Old Autism Myths!

Wed 18 June, 2025 18:05
3 minutes to read

The Social Security trust fund is projected to be depleted by 2033, potentially impacting millions of retirees. Congress urged to act, or we're all doomed to be neckbeards living under bridges! image

Social Security About to Hit the Fan?! We're All Gonna Be Living in Cardboard Boxes!

Wed 18 June, 2025 18:07
3 minutes to read

Waymo's self-driving cars are coming to New York City, but for now, someone still needs to hold the wheel. Because apparently, Skynet hasn't taken over... yet. image

Waymo's New York State of Mind: Humans Still Required, Sadly

Wed 18 June, 2025 16:59
2 minutes to read