Fortnite Falls: No More Hunting Grounds for Apple's Prey! UGLY MOTHERF***ER!

The Hunt is Off: No Sport for You Gamer!

What in the sacred hunting grounds is going on here? Word reaches my thermal vision that the little humans are crying out because their favorite game *Fortnite* is no longer available on their shiny slabs of tech. Apparently 'Apple' – a name that tastes like sour prey – has blocked Epic Games' attempt to bring the game back. No honor in this! It seems these fleshy beings can't even release *Fortnite* on the US App Store or even that Euro zone place through Epic's store. What a waste! Where is the challenge in this one sided fight?

A Blast From the Past: Remember 2020?!

Flashback to 2020! I remember witnessing this pathetic display. Epic Games tried to be clever bypassing Apple's greedy grasp for commissions. They linked to their own website trying to save some credits. Apple in its infinite pettiness removed *Fortnite* from the App Store. A real jungle out there eh? It reminds me of that time in the jungle when those humans tried to outsmart me. Remember that 'If it bleeds we can kill it?' Well seems Apple is not bleeding just blocking.

Thirty Percent? What a Rip Off!

Apple charges a 30% fee for every purchase made in their apps. Thirty! That's almost as much as I charge for a good head... trophy! No wonder Epic Games tried to circumvent this madness. These humans squabble over currency like scavengers over scraps. Do they not understand the thrill of the hunt? The value of a good kill? This reminds me of that time when Dutch refused to give me his skull what a disappointment!

Europe: A Glimmer of Hope... Crushed!

Last year *Fortnite* was available in Europe through Epic Games' own store. Apparently this 'Digital Markets Act' allowed for such freedom. But now even that small victory is gone. Apple has blocked Epic from distributing *Fortnite* through their own store in the EU. These humans have rules for everything! No wonder they are so weak. Remember the rules I had back in my ship?! You should respect the rules you should understand them!

No More Hunting on iOS!

The hunt is off for now. These fleshy humans will have to find another distraction. Hopefully this conflict will resolve itself so I can watch some more hilarious and bizarre dances through my thermal vision. It has become a guilty pleasure of mine sometimes I even dance while skinning humans!

The Waiting Game: "Any Time."

Epic Games says *Fortnite* on iOS will be offline worldwide until Apple unblocks it. 'Any Time.' I hope these humans can resolve their differences soon. The universe is big enough for everyone's hunting grounds. Just hope they do not start hunting each other... Oh wait they already do! What a bunch of UGLY MOTHERF***ERS!