Burberry Gets Groovy Baby! Major Overhaul Could Impact 1,700 Positions!

Oh Behave! Burberry Busts a Move!

Right then! Burberry that super posh British brand is shaking things up like I shake my martini! Word on the street is they're making some *ahem* adjustments to get back on track baby! CEO Joshua Schulman is pulling out all the stops to revive this heritage brand and bring it back to its former glory! Think of it as giving Austin Powers back his mojo!

Not so Smashing? Potential Job Losses Incoming!

But hold on a tic! The shake up could mean a 'reduction in people related costs' which is fancy speak for... *gulp*... potential job losses for around 1,700 groovy cats and kittens globally by 2027! That's a lot of 'Yeah babies!' turning into 'Oh nos!'. That's almost as many times as I've said 'Groovy' in my life! Hopefully those guys find another job soon... Yeah baby!

Cost Cutting Capers!

They're not just stopping at personnel no way baby! They're cutting costs across the board. Procurement real estate—nothing is safe from the Schulman's cost cutting buzzsaw! But never fear! These changes are supposed to save them around £60 million ($79.9 million). And those savings will only increase totaling £100 million! Schwing!

Sales Slip But Not As Bad As Expected Baby!

Now about those sales baby! They took a bit of a nosedive down 6% in the last quarter. But guess what? Analysts thought it would be even worse like 7%. So it's a small victory! But with total revenue for the year at £2.461 billion ($3.273 billion) they're still ahead of the game! Yeah Baby!

Trench Warfare! (The Coat Kind)

Apparently even Burberry's iconic trench coat is causing a kerfuffle! One analyst said that it 'poses a business challenge. As a lifetime product it naturally limits the frequency of repeat purchases'. Imagine that! Something that lasts a long time isn't making enough money! It's like saying my mojo is too powerful and doesn't need recharging! Preposterous! I tell you! Preposterous!

Is This Turnaround Sustainable? Only Time Will Tell!

So will these changes bring Burberry back to its shagadelic best? Only time will tell baby! But with Schulman at the helm and a bit of Austin Powers style optimism they might just pull it off! Fingers crossed and may the best brand win! Now if you'll excuse me I've got a date with a Swedish fembot!