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Showing 41 to 50 of 91 news articles

I, Bender, report on Europe's mixed market moves, Shell's potential BP binge, and inflation's wild ride. It's all shiny, boss! image

Bender's Bold Blast: Europe's Markets Do the Robot Dance!

Mon 05 May, 2025 12:14
2 minutes to read

Old Man Buffett finally kicks back, hands the keys to the Berkshire Hathaway kingdom to Greg Abel. Prepare for… responsible investing? image

Bite My Shiny Metal Assets! Buffett Passes the Buck (and the Billions) to Abel!

Sat 03 May, 2025 18:27
2 minutes to read

Netflix stock hits an all-time high, fueled by subscription and ad revenue, while traditional media struggles under Trump's tariffs. Bender gives his 'unbiased' take. image

Bite My Shiny Metal Stock! Netflix's Robo-Rally Leaves Media Giants in the Scrapheap!

Fri 02 May, 2025 18:23
2 minutes to read

Oppenheimer says AutoZone is a good investment during tariff stress, and Bender agrees because, hey, more money for booze! image

Bite My Shiny Metal Stock: AutoZone Gets Bender's Upgrade!

Fri 02 May, 2025 11:35
3 minutes to read

Amazon CEO Andy Jassy tries to calm investors' nerves about potential tariff impact, promising (sort of) to keep prices low. Bender isn't buying it. image

Bender's Take: Amazon Braces for Tariff Wars, Promises Cheap Crap (Maybe)

Thu 01 May, 2025 22:07
2 minutes to read

Amazon's chucking a billion smackers a year at movies, hoping to drag Hollywood out of the digital dumpster. Will it work? Who cares, as long as there's beer! image

Bite My Shiny Metal Projector: Amazon Saves Hollywood (Maybe?)

Thu 01 May, 2025 16:00
3 minutes to read

Tesla stock dips as the board seeks a replacement for Elon Musk, hinting at a possible future where robots might actually take over… or at least build better cars. image

Bite My Shiny Metal Shares! Tesla's Looking for a New Meatbag Boss!

Thu 01 May, 2025 06:55
3 minutes to read

Bender reports on the White House's 'Trump Time' approach to trade negotiations with India, which is apparently faster than a penguin on fire. Deals are close, maybe done, but who knows? It's all very confusing, just like human emotions. image

Bite My Shiny Metal Trade Deal: Trump Time vs. India Time

Wed 30 April, 2025 18:34
2 minutes to read

Bender's take on Microsoft's Q3 earnings, potential slowdown, and tariff troubles. Prepare for maximum sarcasm! image

Bite My Shiny Metal Assets: Microsoft's Earnings Report Is Here!

Wed 30 April, 2025 16:00
2 minutes to read

Turns out even robots can't predict the future when trade wars are involved. Stellantis cries 'uncertainty,' I cry for more beer! image

Bender's Take: Stellantis Ditches Forecasts Because Orange Man Bad (Again!)

Wed 30 April, 2025 06:17
2 minutes to read