Woke Up, Spoke to Putin, Must Stop World Going Boom!

A Spot of Bother in Ukraine

Right so I was having my morning cuppa (extra sugar naturally) when I saw the news! Apparently Mr. Trump (not the one with the teddy sadly) had a chinwag with Mr. Putin. Blimey! Seems Ukraine had a bit of a… kerfuffle with some Russian airplanes. Explosions and all that! A bit like when Teddy gets caught in the washing machine only bigger and far less cuddly. Mr. Putin wasn’t too chuffed mind you. Sounded like he was ready to give Ukraine what for. "Mr. Trump said that it was a good conversation but not a conversation that will lead to immediate Peace." Good grief! That sounds like when I try to bake a cake. All the ingredients are there but it ends up looking like… well best not to say!

Putin's Revenge? Oh Dear!

Now Mr. Putin is saying he's got to 'respond' to this airfield business. Oh dear oh dear oh dear! Sounds a bit like when Mrs. Wicket's cat scratches my Mini. She always threatens to 'respond' with a broom! I do hope it doesn’t involve anything too… well explosive. Though thinking about it maybe a strongly worded letter would do the trick. Or a good old fashioned game of conkers! Less messy you see.

Iran's Nuclear Conundrum: A Right Pickle!

And then there’s Iran! Apparently they’re playing hard to get with this whole nuclear weapon thing. "Time is running out," Mr. Trump says. Just like when I’m trying to catch the bus! Panic! Mr. Trump told Mr. Putin that Iran can’t have a nuclear weapon and they seemed to agree. Phew! That's a relief. Mr. Putin even offered to lend a hand! Like when I try to help Mrs. Wicket with the plumbing and end up flooding the entire house. Hopefully he'll be a bit more successful.

Slow Walking and Tick Tocking

Mr. Trump thinks Iran is “slow walking” their decision. Slow walking? Sounds like me trying to walk past a bakery without buying a cake! Impossible! He wants an answer quickly because he wants to be there quickly. Blimey! Let's hope they can sort it out before things get any… boomier! Remember that firework incident? Oh dear!

Trump's Grand Peace Plan: Not Quite Sorted Yet

Mr. Trump promised to fix the whole Russia Ukraine shebang in a day. A day! That's like promising to clean Mrs. Wicket's house in an hour! Ambitious to say the least. Sadly it hasn’t quite worked out. They’re still arguing over bits of land. Much like when I try to park my Mini. Everyone else seems to want the same space! I do hope they can find a way to share nicely. Maybe a tea party would help?

From Friendly to Fraying: A Diplomatic Dilemma

Sounds like Mr. Trump and Mr. Zelenskyy aren't exactly best chums anymore. And Mr. Trump seems a bit miffed with Mr. Putin too! He reckons he’s “gone absolutely CRAZY!”. Oh dear! That’s not good. Sounds like when I accidentally swap Mrs. Wicket’s sugar with salt. Absolute chaos! I suppose even world leaders have their off days. Time for a holiday perhaps? Or a large mug of tea.