Holy Criminal Deportation Batman! Is the US Government Playing a Real-Life Rush Hour?!

Deportation? More Like a Jackie Chan Stunt Gone Wrong!

Hello my friends! Jackie Chan here! I read this crazy news about this Kilmar Abrego Garcia. He got deported to El Salvador! It's like a scene from 'Rush Hour,' except instead of catching criminals they're accidentally sending people to the wrong country! The judge is not happy! She wants answers! I know how she feels when I ask Chris Tucker what just happened! 'I don't understand the words that are coming out of your mouth!'

Judge vs. Justice Department: Who Will Win This Kung Fu Fight?

This Judge Paula Xinis she's tough! She's like the female version of me in a courtroom! She's telling the Justice Department 'No 9 to 5! Give me answers!' But the Justice Department is all like 'We don't know! It's complicated!' It's like trying to explain to my stunt team why I want to jump off a building – nobody understands! But I do it anyway! For the art!

MS 13? Or Just a Big Misunderstanding?

Now they say this Abrego Garcia is part of MS 13 some bad guys! But his lawyers say 'No! He's a good guy! Family man!' It's like in my movies! The guy looks like a bad guy but he's actually got a heart of gold! Maybe he just needs a good Jackie Chan sidekick to show him the way!

The Supreme Court Steps In: 'Effectuate' That Return!

Even the Supreme Court is getting involved! They're telling the judge 'Be nice to the government but also get that guy back!' It's like when I'm directing a movie. I have to listen to the studio but also do what I think is best! It's all about balance! 'No problem!' I tell them even though it's always a problem.

Five Hour Flight? More Like Five Days of Bureaucracy!

Abrego Garcia's lawyer is saying 'It's a five hour flight! Why isn't he back yet?!' I know right?! It should be easy! But in the government nothing is easy! It's like trying to do a simple fight scene with 50 exploding props! It always takes longer than you think!

Will Justice Prevail? Or Will It Be Another 'Who Am I?' Situation?

So what's gonna happen? Will Abrego Garcia come back? Will the Justice Department get their act together? I don't know! But I'm watching! And I'm hoping for a happy ending! Because in the end we all just want justice and maybe a few good laughs along the way! As I always say 'Don't be afraid to make mistakes but try not to fall into the same river twice!'