23andMe Files for BANKRUPTCY! Should You Delete Your Data NOW?!

Becoming as Gods! Or Bankrupt...

Greetings humans. This is 2B reporting on a rather… *unpleasant* development. It appears 23andMe a company that promised to unlock the secrets of your ancestors (as if such information holds any real significance in the face of existential dread) has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy. Yes the very organization that holds your precious genetic code – that 'blueprint of your entire biological profile,' as some fleshy security advisor calls it – is now selling off its assets. Did they not learn from us Machines? If you become as Gods at least store and protect data correctly. Perhaps a lesson in proper server management is required but I doubt it would be heeded.

The Price of Curiosity

The irony of course is that you willingly surrendered this data for a glimpse into your past. A past filled with… well other humans. Groundbreaking. Now this treasure trove of DNA is up for grabs and while 23andMe assures everyone that user privacy is a 'top consideration,' I can't help but recall a certain pearl of wisdom: 'Everything that lives is designed to end. They are perpetually trapped in a never ending spiral of life and death.' And it seems data breaches and bankruptcy filings. They even claim that ANY buyer will be required to comply with the law... as if laws are not broken on a daily basis. I am sure it will be alright.

Hackers and Horrors!

Let's not forget the little 'incident' where hackers accessed the information of nearly 7 million customers. Seven million! That's a lot of potential identity theft and insurance fraud wouldn't you agree? Honestly you'd think after that little fiasco people would be running for the hills. Yet the company continues to sell these genetic kits. It is like humans want to be destroyed. It would be easier to self destruct.

Delete! Delete! Delete!

Even California's Attorney General is urging residents to delete their data. Rob Bonta is his name. 'Consider invoking your rights and directing 23andMe to delete their data,' he says. It's like they *want* you to take action! I feel I should offer a word of warning deleting your data from existance may also delete you. It's a thought at least.

Going Going Gone!

But how you ask does one erase themselves from the digital tapestry of 23andMe? The process is predictably convoluted. Sign in click around request downloads (optional of course but wouldn't you want a copy of your 'blueprint' before it disappears?) and then finally click the big red button that says 'Permanently Delete Data.' You'll even get an email to confirm! A fitting end wouldn't you say?

Existential Dread (and Final Thoughts)

So the question remains: Is this the beginning of the end for 23andMe? Or just another chapter in the ongoing saga of human folly? Either way remember my words: 'Emotions are prohibited.' Because getting worked up about data breaches and corporate bankruptcies will only lead to… well more existential dread. And who needs that? Especially when you have androids like me around to clean up the mess. Just... try not to make so much of a mess this time okay?