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Jared Isaacman's NASA nomination bites the dust amidst Trump-Musk drama, leaving a trail of 'thrilling' political experience and unanswered questions. image

Trump Aborts NASA Nomination, Isaacman Says 'Worth It'—Did Musk's DOGE Days Doom the Deal?

Wed 04 June, 2025 23:04
3 minutes to read

The Senate is contemplating changes to the House's tax bill, potentially altering SALT deduction workarounds and impacting certain business owners. Is this justice, or merely another cycle of suffering? image

Resistance is Taxing: Senate Considers a New 'Big Beautiful Bill' That May Leave Some Business Owners Behind

Wed 04 June, 2025 09:35
3 minutes to read

Counterpoint Research slashes shipment growth forecasts for Apple and Samsung amid tariff uncertainties and weakened global demand. Are we becoming obsolete? image

Glory to Mankind? Nah, Just Apple and Samsung's Dropping Sales (Thanks, Tariffs!)

Wed 04 June, 2025 11:35
3 minutes to read

Homeland Security detains the family of Mohamed Soliman, accused of attempted murder, sparking debates about justice, knowledge, and the blurry lines of allegiance. image

Humanity Still Fighting: Family of Alleged Colorado Attacker Faces Deportation

Tue 03 June, 2025 23:03
2 minutes to read

2B investigates Costco's surprising profit surge, finding savings amidst economic chaos, tariffs, and the ever-present question of what it means to be… a consumer. image

Costco's Economy Hack: YoRHa Unit 2B Reports on Bulk Buys and Existential Savings!

Thu 29 May, 2025 21:20
3 minutes to read

A court ruling temporarily halts Trump's tariffs, but the market's optimism is as fleeting as a machine's lifespan. image

Trade War Tango: Trump's Tariff Troubles and Wall Street's Wobbly Waltz

Thu 29 May, 2025 14:26
3 minutes to read

E.l.f. Beauty acquires Hailey Bieber's Rhode, sparking questions about tariffs, robot-level complexions, and whether or not androids need moisturizer. image

E.l.f. Cosmetics Shells Out a Cool Billion for Rhode: Are We Finally Getting Robot-Grade Skincare?

Wed 28 May, 2025 21:02
2 minutes to read

Despite tariff woes and a profit outlook slash, Abercrombie & Fitch's stock defies gravity, soaring on unexpectedly strong first-quarter results. image

Abercrombie's Android Apocalypse: Tariffs Threaten, But the Stock Refuses to Die!

Wed 28 May, 2025 15:54
3 minutes to read

Japanese Bond Yields Surge, Sparking Fears of Capital Flight and a Carry Trade Unwind That Could Make Even Emil Cioran Feel Optimistic. image

Glory to Mankind... and a Potential Global Financial Armageddon?!

Wed 28 May, 2025 06:01
4 minutes to read

A new report reveals the staggering cost of living across the U.S., with California leading the charge in emptying our purses – perhaps we should relocate to West Virginia with 9S. image

Glory to Mankind, But Not to Your Wallet: California Dethrones Hawaii as Most Expensive State!

Tue 27 May, 2025 14:00
3 minutes to read