Get Over Here! Apple's Earnings Face Trump's Tariff Fatality!

Toasty! A Financial Inferno Approaches

Greetings mortals! Scorpion here your harbinger of financial doom... or perhaps just a mild market correction. Apple that fruit named behemoth is about to reveal its fiscal second quarter earnings. Wall Street trembles not from my hellfire but from the uncertainty of Trump's tariffs. 'Get over here!' could very well be what Apple execs are screaming at their supply chain managers right now.

Finish Him! The Tariff Threat

These tariffs conceived in the Netherrealm of political maneuvering threaten to inflict a 'Fatality' on Apple's bottom line. Sources say these tariffs may cause the price of Apple products to increase. Three quarters of Apple's revenue comes from physical products forged in the fiery depths of Chinese factories. The U.S. their largest market now faces a 145% tariff. The analysts at TD Cowen those wise elder gods foresee a 6% earnings reduction. 'You're next!' cries the market as investors await Apple's next move.

Brutality! No Guidance Given

Since 2020 Apple has left investors blind without guidance. Perhaps they fear revealing their strategies or perhaps even they have no idea what they're doing in the face of macroeconomic uncertainty. Analysts predict $89 billion in sales for the June quarter. But who can truly predict the future when the sands of time are controlled by the whims of politicians? This is truely a 'Test Your Might' moment.

Flawless Victory? A Tariff Silver Lining

However there is hope. A glimmer of light amidst the darkness. Customers may hoard iPhones and other Apple products to avoid the tariff's sting. This could inflate the March quarter's revenue giving Apple a temporary boost. Wall Street expects $94.60 billion in revenue. Perhaps Apple can yet snatch victory from the jaws of defeat.

China's Mortal Kombat

Apple's performance in China faces its own test. Chinese nationalism may weaken the iPhone's allure in the Middle Kingdom and the trade war adds fuel to the fire. Analysts will question CEO Tim Cook about the outlook for mainland China seeking insights into the company's strategy. 'Where there is smoke there is fire.' Apple sales need to reach $17 billion according to FactSet.

The Final Round: Predictions and Prayers

So here we stand on the precipice of Apple's financial revelation. Will they survive the tariff onslaught? Will their Chinese sales falter? Only time will tell. According to LSEG Wall Street expects: Earnings per share: $1.63 Revenue: $94.60 billion. Remember mortals the market is a cruel mistress. 'Get over here!' applies to losses as well as gains. Now if you'll excuse me I have some souls to collect.