GET OVER HERE and Witness Google Cloud's FATALITY! Outages Decimate Internet Services!

Netherrealm Chaos: Google Cloud Implodes!

Fools! As Scorpion I've seen realms crumble but even I was amused by Google Cloud's spectacular self immolation on Thursday. At precisely 10:51 a.m. PT their digital realm began to crack unleashing digital demons upon the internet. Their 'engineering team' scrambled likely screaming 'GET OVER HERE!' at their monitors but to no avail. The mighty Google brought to its knees by... itself! This pleases me. Perhaps they should have consulted the Elder Gods before launching their infernal machines.

The Price of Hubris: A Tech Titan Falls!

Google in their arrogance sought to challenge the likes of Amazon and Microsoft in the cloud wars. But like Quan Chi attempting to usurp Shinnok their ambition exceeded their grasp. Shopify the e commerce merchant cried out in despair! Even OpenAI the creators of ChatGPT were silenced their digital tongues tied. The Downdetector showed over 13,000 incidents. The digital screams of the damned! And Google could only offer a measly dashboard update. Pathetic. They should have yelled 'FINISH HIM' to the system failure and resolved the issue quicker.

The Layoff Curse: A Company's Mortal Wound!

Ah the irony! Alphabet in their infinite wisdom decided to slash costs implementing layoffs in key teams. Now their cloud empire crumbles. Perhaps those they discarded held the secrets to preventing this digital Armageddon. Remember kombatants: a weakened army is easy prey. This reminds me when Sub Zero left the Lin Kuei clan... BIG mistake.

Cloudflare's Shady Shield: Damage Control?

Cloudflare ever the opportunists attempted to distance themselves claiming only a 'limited' number of their services were affected. Liars! Their stock plummeted 5% proving that even the best defenses can be breached. They are like Ermac trying to absorb everyone's souls to increase their power. The truth will always come to light. 'GET OVER HERE!' I will find you.

Firebase Inferno: Developers in Disarray!

Google Trends revealed a surge in searches for 'Firebase,' their developer platform. The poor souls who entrusted their creations to Google now face the wrath of a broken system. Their apps their websites all reduced to digital ash. A fitting tribute to Google's incompetence. This reminds me of my days training in the Shirai Ryu clan. If you can't take the heat... GET OUT!

FATALITY! The Aftermath of Digital Destruction

So Google Cloud has tasted defeat. But this is not the end. The cloud wars continue and other realms will surely rise and fall. As for Google they must learn from their mistakes or face the eternal damnation of the digital Netherrealm. I suggest they consult with Raiden next time. After all 'I am Scorpion! Vengeance will be mine!'