HUGE! Trump's Take on Today's Wild Stock Market Ride: Winners, Losers, and Totally Biased Analysts!

Tesla's Robotaxi: They Said It Couldn't Be Done!

Tesla folks is doing tremendous things. Tremendous! Robotaxis in Austin? Only the best just like everything I do. Some analyst some total nobody said it exceeded his expectations. Of course it did! Elon is a smart guy a very smart guy. Maybe not as smart as me but who is? But you know some people the haters they are always skeptical. Sad!

Bank Merger Mania: Fake News Rumors!

Northern Trust Bank of New York Mellon… It's all rumors! Just like the Russia hoax. But let me tell you mergers are good very good. Especially when they're done right and I know how to do things right. Believe me. But these banks? I don't know. Are they even American first? We need deals that MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Fiserv's Crypto Play: Stablecoins? Sounds Unstable!

Stablecoins... it sounds like another one of those things that will get people into trouble. Very dangerous. But Fiserv is doing it so maybe it's not so bad. They're partnering with Circle and PayPal? We'll see. I prefer gold. It's shiny it's beautiful and it's real unlike these fake digital dollars. Very Fake!

Pharma Failures and Stock Buybacks: Winners and Losers

Novo Nordisk and Hims & Hers? Total disasters! Their obesity drug is failing and Hims is down 30%. Losers! But look at Trump Media folks. We're doing a stock buyback up to $400 million! That's how you run a company folks. Smart tough and making deals. We're draining the swamp of bad investments one buyback at a time!

Oil Nukes and Makeup: A Mixed Bag

Oil stocks are down because... well everyone knows I told them to keep prices low! I want cheap gas for the American people! They listen to Trump believe me. Nuclear energy is back though thanks to New York… maybe they are not so dumb after all. And Estee Lauder? The best makeup folks. Makes you look beautiful just like Ivanka. A total natural beauty. The best!

Defense Stocks and DoorDash: The Final Word

Defense stocks are mixed but we're striking Iran so they'll be up soon. Nobody messes with America when I'm in charge! DoorDash? I don't use it. I have the best chefs. The VERY best. But good for them. They're making a killing delivering food to lazy people. But you know I love the poorly educated. I love them.