Apple and Meta Spanked! EU Says 'No More Funny Business'!

Oh Dear a Spanking for Apple?

Right then what's all this commotion? Seems those clever chaps at the 'European Onion' (or is it Union?) have given Apple a right telling off! A whopping 500 million euros! That's a lot of pennies even more than I found down the back of my sofa. Apparently Apple wasn't playing nicely with their 'App Store' rules. It's like when Teddy wants all the biscuits and I only let him have one... naughty!

Meta Gets a Telling Off Too!

And it seems Meta the Facebook and Instagram people got their bottoms smacked too! Only 200 million euros this time. A bit less than Apple but still enough to buy a lifetime supply of custard creams! The EU said they were making people share their private thoughts or pay extra to keep them secret. Honestly it's all very complicated. Like trying to understand why Mrs. Wicket always hides my toothbrush!

Anti Steering? Sounds Like a Bad Driving Day!

They're saying Apple weren't letting other people tell folks about different things outside their App Store. It's like when I tried to drive my Mini from the roof a total catastrophe! Should've just stuck to using the steering wheel just like Apple should have shared!

Sharing is Caring (Unless It's Your Data?)

Meta were making people share their secrets or pay for them to be kept safe. Sounds like when Scrapper tries to steal Teddy! But I always catch him. You can't go around stealing people's personal information that's just not cricket!

A Multi Billion Dollar Tariff? Cor Blimey!

Now Mr. Kaplan from Meta is saying this will cost them billions and make things worse for everyone. Honestly it sounds like when I tried to decorate my flat for Christmas and ended up flooding the place. Sometimes meddling just makes things worse!

More Trouble Brewing?

Well that's the news for now! I'm off to find Teddy and have a nice cup of tea seems like everyone could use one after all this bother. Let's just hope this doesn't mean they'll start charging extra for my favorite shows on TV. Off I go! Bye!