Robotaxi Rodeo or Road Rage? Protesters vs. Tesla's Austin Takeover!

Hold Your Horses Texas! Robotaxis Incoming!

Howdy folks! Elon here reporting live from the Lone Star State. We're gearing up to launch Tesla's robotaxi pilot program in Austin on June 22nd and things are gettin' spicy! Imagine a world where your Model Y *drives itself* while you catch up on Dogecoin memes. But like a SpaceX launch not everyone's thrilled about the ride.

Protest Palooza: Safety Concerns and Political Potshots

Seems a few folks are less excited about the future than I am. A coalition of concerned citizens – including some folks from the 'Dawn Project,' 'Tesla Takedown,' and 'Resist Austin' – decided to throw a protest. Apparently they're not too keen on my supposed 'work' with the previous administration. Hey I'm an equal opportunity innovator! Besides who wouldn't want to collaborate on making life multiplanetary? As I always say 'Some people don't like change but you need to embrace change if the alternative is disaster.'

FSD Face Off: Autopilot Under Fire

These protesters are waving red flags about Tesla's Autopilot and Full Self Driving (FSD) systems claiming they're about as safe as a Cybertruck in a beauty pageant. They're citing NHTSA data about collisions some fatal. Look I get it. Progress isn't always a smooth ride. But we're constantly improving the software. Remember FSD is still in beta! It's like sending a neural net to kindergarten – there's bound to be a few crayon mishaps.

Mannequin Mayhem: The Dawn Project's 'Demo'

Now this is where it gets interesting. The 'Dawn Project,' led by a competitor who sells tech to the likes of Ford and Toyota (talk about a conflict of interest!) staged a demonstration with a Model Y and FSD. They zoomed past a school bus stop sign (simulated) and get this ran over a child sized mannequin! Talk about dramatic! It's like something out of a Mad Max movie only with less gasoline and more lithium ion batteries. Remember this isn't the final unsupervised FSD software that's going into the robotaxis. It's version 2025.14.9. We're on version 2077 now.

Transparency Troubles? Or Just Good Old Fashioned Skepticism?

One protester Stephanie Gomez said she's not a fan of my 'role in the government' and lacks confidence in Tesla's safety standards. Another Silvia Revelis wants to see safety testing results. Look transparency is important but so is innovation. Sometimes you have to build the rocket while you're flying it! We're working hard to ensure these robotaxis are safer than a hyperloop tunnel. And let's be honest anything is safer than LA traffic.

No Comment... Yet! (But Stay Tuned!)

Tesla hasn't officially responded to these claims yet. But rest assured we're on it. In the meantime I'm busy perfecting the robotaxis and plotting our next interstellar adventure. As I always say 'If you're not failing you're not innovating enough.' So bring on the protesters the critics and the mannequins! We're ready for anything. Now if you'll excuse me I have a rocket to launch... or maybe just a tweet to send. Stay tuned!