Another Day, Another Disaster! Trump Coin Holders Promised Dinner with the Beast!

Can Anyone Hear Me?!

Alright listen up people. This is Ripley last survivor of the Nostromo. And I'm telling you this whole crypto thing is starting to feel a lot like LV 426. You go poking around in places you shouldn't you're gonna find something nasty. This time it's a meme coin called $TRUMP. Apparently it jumped higher than a Xenomorph on amphetamines because the top holders get to have dinner with… well you know. Let's just say the former guy who likes to say 'believe me'.

Dinner with the President? Sounds Like a Trap!

Dinner with…him? Black tie optional they say. More like black hole optional. Reminds me of Ash trying to get me back on the ship with the Alien! What could possibly go wrong? A VIP White House Tour the next day? Someone check the air ducts for facehuggers please! This whole thing smells worse than a reactor core meltdown.

Value?! I Doubt It!

They say this $TRUMP coin is worth billions. Billions! And for what? No product no service. Just…Trump. Reminds me of Weyland Yutani. All about profit no matter the cost. Except instead of unleashing a Xenomorph on the universe it seems they are content to let this…Trump coin…loose on the gullible. Someone tell me again why the SEC isn't looking closer at this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!

Melania's Got Coin Too?!

Oh and get this the First Lady had her own coin $MELANIA. It briefly topped $2 billion before crashing even faster than my escape pod from the Nostromo. Seriously? This is a family affair now? Just proves what I've always known: in space (and apparently in crypto) no one can hear you scream…with laughter.

80% Locked Away: Looks Like Insider Action to Me!

Here's the kicker: only 20% of the $TRUMP supply is available to trade. The rest is locked up for three years held by insiders. Sounds to me like they're just waiting for the right moment to cash in leaving everyone else holding the bag. Remember what Burke said? 'We're talking about profit Ripley profit!' These guys are playing the same game just with digital assets instead of alien eggs.

This is Crypto Not a Rescue Mission!

Look I'm just a Warrant Officer. I make my living hauling freight. But I know when something stinks. And this whole $TRUMP meme coin thing? It stinks worse than the garbage compactor on the Nostromo after a week in deep space. Be careful out there. And remember my words: 'Stay frosty' and keep your eyes peeled and be very wary. You are not dealing with your average meme coin but with a very smart business man.