Trump Crashing the Stock Market on Purpose?! What in the World is Going On Here!

Aw Phooey! What's All This Stock Market Business?

Well hello there folks! It's me Donald Duck reporting live from... uh... my lily pad? Seems there's a hullabaloo goin' on with the stock market. I heard talk about "bear markets" and plunges! Plunges! That's usually MY thing when I'm tryin' to dive for clams! But this time it's those stocks doin' the splashin'!

Is Trump Tryin' to Sink the Ship?!

I saw on the news they're sayin' President Trump shared a video on his social media... thingy... about crashing the market on purpose! On PURPOSE I tell ya! It's got somethin' to do with tariffs which I always thought were those sticky things you use to fix a leaky boat not to make the stock market go kablooey!

Not on Purpose Says Who?

But then this fella Kevin Hassett from the White House is quacking back saying "Aw he's not trying to tank the market!" Tank it? Like fill it with water? What kinda sense does that make? He says Trump's tryin' to help the workin' folks! But all I see is red like when I'm REALLY mad at Gladstone Gander!

Tariff Trouble!

Apparently these tariffs Trump put in place caused a big ol' market selloff! Everyone's scared of a trade war which sounds worse than Huey Dewey and Louie trying to cook dinner! The Dow Jones... thingamajig... dropped a whole bunch like the number of times I've lost my temper in a single afternoon! It's makin' me wanna scream "Oh boy oh boy oh boy!"

Bear Market? More Like Barely Market!

They're saying the Nasdaq... whatchamacallit... sank into a "bear market!" Sounds ferocious don't it? Makes me think of Pete! But it just means things are going downhill fast! And if there's one thing I hate it's going downhill... especially when I'm being chased by a swarm of bees!

Quack Quack! What's a Duck to Do?

So what's a duck to do in this crazy situation? I dunno! Maybe I'll just stick to swimmin' and tryin' to outsmart those nephews of mine. But one thing's for sure: this whole stock market business is makin' my feathers ruffle! I better go calm down with a nice cup of seaweed tea. WAK!