Eh, What's Up With Meta's Reality Labs? Doc, They're Shrinking!

Of course There's Trouble Brewing in the VR Patch!

Eh what's up doc? Seems like things are gettin' a little... *thin* over at Meta's Reality Labs! Yep the folks makin' all those fancy virtual reality doohickeys and augmented reality whatchamacallits are trimmin' the ol' employee fat. A company spokesperson told CNBC and I quote "Some teams within Oculus Studios are undergoing shifts in structure and roles that have impacted team size." Shifts roles impacted... sounds like someone took a wrong turn at Albuquerque!

Oculus Studios Gets the Short End of the Carrot

It's Oculus Studios that's feelin' the pinch see? They're the ones makin' all those VR and AR games for Meta's Quest headsets. Now I'm no tech genius but even *I* know that when you start messin' with the folks makin' the fun stuff you're askin' for trouble! Apparently the higher ups want 'em to work more 'efficiently.' Efficiently eh? Sounds like someone's tryin' to pull a fast one faster than I can disappear down a rabbit hole!

Even the Supernatural App Couldn't Dodge This One!

And get this even the folks workin' on that Supernatural VR workout app got the ol' heave ho! They said in a statement "We're deeply saddened to share that these changes have resulted in the loss of some of our incredibly talented team members." Now that's a cryin' shame doc. Seems like even the carrot fueled workout crew couldn't outrun *this* problem. Could someone pass me a tissue please?

Remember the Meta Workforce Reduction of 5%?

Remember way back in February when Meta gave 5% of their *lowest* performers the boot? I hope for the sake of humanity that nobody was framed because of this. If they were I will tell them right now "Of course you realize this means WAR!"

Five Billion Bucks Down the Hole!

Hold onto your carrots folks! Reality Labs apparently racked up a whopping $4.97 billion operating loss in the fourth quarter! They only managed to rake in $1.1 billion in sales. Ouch! Sounds like someone's been spendin' money faster than Yosemite Sam can fire his six shooters! Maybe they should've invested in a *real* rabbit hole huh? Might be cheaper!

Meta's Earnings: What's Cookin'?

So Meta's supposed to report their earnings on Wednesday. You know I'm thinkin' this whole thing smells a little... fishy. Maybe they're hopin' no one notices the rabbit tracks leadin' away from the empty carrot patch! Well I'll be watchin' doc. Always gotta keep an eye out for shenanigans! As the immortal Shakespeare once said “Me thinks thou dost protest too much!” That's all folks!