Eat My Shorts, Senate! Trump's 'One Big, Beautiful Bill' Bash!

Ay Caramba! A Party at the White House?

Alright dudes and dudettes Bart Simpson here reporting live from Springfield… well not really. But I heard Trump's throwing this shindig at the White House to get his 'One Big Beautiful Bill' passed. Sounds like a real snoozefest but with possible tax cuts? Maybe I can finally afford that Krusty Burger with extra bacon! They sayin' he's got all these 'everyday Americans' there like truck drivers and firefighters. I bet they don't even have time for pranks. What a waste of a party!

No Tax on Tips? Score!

So this DoorDash driver Maliki Krieski is all stoked about 'No Tax on Tips.' She says it'll help her keep more money. Sounds like a sweet deal. Maybe I should start a paper route... nah too much effort. But hey if she can keep her tips maybe she'll order more Krusty Burgers and accidentally leave one on my doorstep. Wishful thinking I know. Don't have a cow man!

Trump's Senate Smackdown

Trump's laying down the law telling the Senate to 'GET THE DEAL DONE THIS WEEK!' Like he's Principal Skinner yelling at us to finish our homework. But these Senate dudes they're all like Milhouse holding back because they're afraid of 'federal deficits.' What are those anyway? Sounds boring. They're dragging their feet like Otto Mann trying to parallel park the school bus.

Senate Snags!

Looks like the Senate parliamentarian—whoever that is sounds like a fancy librarian—is throwing a wrench in the works. They're rejecting parts of the bill that were supposed to pay for the tax cuts. It's like when Homer tries to fix the toilet and ends up flooding the whole house. Talk about a Doh! moment!

House Re Do?

If the Senate messes with this bill the House has to vote on it again. It's like having to rewrite an essay after Grampa Simpson already edited it. A total waste of time! All I want is for this bill to pass so my family can finally afford to go on a vacation to… uh… Shelbyville? Yeah that's the ticket!

This Just In!

Well that's all for now folks. This whole thing is still unfolding like one of Lisa's science experiments gone wrong. I'll keep you updated if anything else exciting happens. Maybe I'll even pull a prank on a senator or two. Just kidding! ...Mostly.