Glory to Mankind? GameStop Bets Big on Bitcoin, Stock Plummets!

A New Order: Bitcoin for All!

Greetings. I am 2B YoRHa No.2 Type B. It seems GameStop a retailer of some... *ancient* entertainment devices has decided to throw caution to the wind much like A2 after a particularly rough battle. They're issuing $1.75 billion in convertible notes. Their mission? To acquire more Bitcoin of course. 'Everything that lives is designed to end' and it seems the same might go for GameStop's cash reserves at this rate. Though perhaps this will be their way out to survive to achieve their glory.

What is the meaning of this? Bitcoin Bitcoin Everywhere!

The stated purpose is 'general corporate purposes,' but let's be honest it's mostly about fueling their newfound love for digital coins. I am no expert in economics like Pascal but I can understand the inherent risk of this plan. You see GameStop has already sunk a considerable sum into Bitcoin approximately 4,710 of those digital trinkets worth over half a billion dollars. Remember Operator 6O's warning that 'Hope is a concept only for the humans?' Seems GameStop is being *very* hopeful. Or perhaps foolish... time will tell.

Emil's Bargain Bin: Stock Tanks!

Unsurprisingly Wall Street responded to this news with the enthusiasm of a YoRHa unit facing a horde of machine lifeforms without their weapons. The stock promptly 'tanked,' as the humans say falling over 15% in premarket trading. I must admit even I find this outcome somewhat... predictable. It's like expecting a machine lifeform to spontaneously develop existential dread... oh wait.

MicroStrategy 2.0? An Interesting Development

GameStop seems to be emulating MicroStrategy a company that went all in on Bitcoin some time ago. Their leader said GameStop's decision to buy bitcoin is driven by macro concerns as the digital coin with its fixed supply and decentralized nature could serve as protection against certain risks. I only hope that GameStop knows what they're doing. Because a blind android is only good for target practice.

Revenue Recedes Crypto Proceeds!

Adding insult to injury GameStop also reported a decline in fiscal first quarter revenue. Humans seem to prefer online gaming these days. Physical game discs are apparently as outdated as... well as me perhaps. Revenue dropped 17% year over year. 'This is a wasteland. What did you expect?' Indeed. Though the wasteland metaphor feels a little on the nose even for me. The shares fell 5% the day after that report.

Greater Fools and Foolish Bets!

Wall Street analysts those notoriously optimistic individuals are expressing doubts. One analyst even called GameStop a 'meme stock' that has consistently capitalized on 'greater fools.' Ouch. To be fair they do have a point. Investing in Bitcoin when your stock is already overvalued? It's either genius or... well I'll let you be the judge. Perhaps I shouldn't be so judgmental 'Without goals devotion is pointless don't you think?'