Aw, Phooey! Maersk's Profits Soar, But Trade Wars Got Me Shakin' in My Feathers!

What in the World is EBITDA?!

Aw gee whiz! This just in from those fancy pants at Maersk! Turns out even though the world's gone a little coo coo they're still swimming in dough! Their preliminary underlying earnings before interest tax depreciation and amortization whatever THAT gobbledygook means hit $2.71 billion! That's 70% higher than last year! 70 PERCENT!! I could buy a whole lotta hats with that kind of scratch!

Uncle Sam's Trade Tantrum!

But hold on a minute folks! Don't go splurging all your duck bills just yet! Seems like this whole U.S. China tariff hooey is causing a real kerfuffle. Maersk is warning that if these tariffs keep goin' on global container market volumes might just take a nosedive faster than me trying to ice skate! As that Clerc fella said "things got a bit more bumpy" after April 2nd! Bumpy is an understatement if you ask me! More like a full blown shipwreck!

Revised Forecasts? Oh Boy Oh Boy Oh Boy!

They're even changing their tune about next year! Used to be they were all chirpy about container volume growth predicting a swell 4% increase. Now? They're saying it could be anywhere from 1% to 4%! That's a bigger range than my temper on a bad day! This "increased macroeconomic and geopolitical uncertainty" sounds like a real headache if you ask me! And you did right? Right?!

The Donald vs. China: Who Will Win?!

It's all because of that other Donald... you know the one with the funny hair? He's slapped a whopping 145% import duty on Chinese products! And China's fightin' back with their own tariffs on U.S. goods! It's like watching Huey Dewey and Louie have a squabble... only with way more money and less common sense! What's the world coming to I tell ya!

Red Sea Blues!

And just when you thought things couldn't get worse those Red Sea disruptions are still muckin' things up! I bet those pirates are having a field day! It's enough to make a duck tear his feathers out! Seriously folks this is a real "Oh what's the use?!" moment.

Volatility Ahead! Hold onto Your Hats!

So what's a duck to do? Well Clerc says to expect “a lot of volatility ahead.” Which means we should all brace ourselves for a wild ride! China U.S. container market volumes have already plummeted 30% to 40% in April! That's a bigger drop than my IQ when I'm trying to understand taxes! Better hold onto your hats folks! It's gonna be a bumpy ride!