Disney's Fiscal Firefight: Mouse House Roars Back (No Xenomorphs Involved...Yet)

The Mouse That Roared...or Did It?

Alright people listen up. Ripley here. Heard the news about Disney's latest earnings report. Numbers are up subscribers are flocking to Disney+ and they're building a new theme park in Abu Dhabi. Sounds like a fairytale right? Makes you almost forget about all the corporate chest bursting that's been going on lately. I've seen enough corporate restructuring to know that sometimes 'happy endings' are just the lull before another xenomorph shows up. Remember in space no one can hear you scream...or complain about the price of churros.

Streaming: A Signal or Just Noise?

So Disney+ added 1.4 million subscribers. They were expecting a drop but SURPRISE! People are still willing to pay to watch… whatever it is they’re watching. Maybe they're showing that old Nostromo footage on repeat? Anyway seems like direct to consumer is where it's at. Revenue up 8%. Smart move jacking up the prices! I always say if you wanna survive in this galaxy gotta be adaptable. Just like when you're facing down a Xenomorph...or a corporate board meeting. It's all about survival!

Parks and Recreation...of Your Bank Account

The theme parks are still raking in the dough despite those ridiculously long lines. Domestic parks are booming but international ones are lagging a bit. Probably because they haven't figured out how to put a Xenomorph on a rollercoaster yet. Give it time. They did mention a new cruise ship the Disney Treasure. Wonder if they have a self destruct sequence planned just in case. You know for emergencies. You never know what's lurking in the shadows...or in the buffet line.

ESPN: Still Kicking?

ESPN's revenue is up thanks to more football games. Seems like people will watch anything as long as there's a ball involved. Good for them. More viewers higher ad rates. The company now expects its sports segment’s operating income growth will be up 18% year over year. Reminds me of those motion trackers always pinging. But this time it's money instead of monsters.

Snow White's Off Day

Not all is pixie dust and happy thoughts apparently. 'Snow White' and the latest 'Captain America' movie didn't exactly set the box office on fire. But hey 'Mufasa: The Lion King' and 'Moana 2' are coming to the rescue. Guess even Disney has its off days. Makes me feel a little better about that time I accidentally blew up the Nostromo. Well not really. That was a *necessary* evil.

Final Thoughts: Stay Frosty Mouseketeers

So Disney's doing alright for now. But remember corporations are like alien species: unpredictable and often dangerous. Always keep your eyes open trust your instincts and never ever sign a contract without reading the fine print. Oh and if you see something moving in the vents at that new Abu Dhabi park *run*. You're on your own.