Another Bug Hunt? Trump Jr.'s $500K D.C. Club Has a Waiting List Already!

Not Again!

Alright people listen up. Ripley here and I'm telling you this whole thing smells worse than the Nostromo's galley after a Xenomorph got loose. Word on the street – or should I say from some unnamed sources who probably value their respiratory systems – is that Donald Trump Jr. has launched a new private club in D.C. called 'Executive Branch.' Fancy right? The kind of fancy that costs half a million just to walk through the door. Seems like some folks didn't learn from past mistakes. Or maybe they did and just don't care.

No One Can Hear You Complain About the Cover Charge

Five hundred grand. That's more than I made on a whole damn mission. And there's a waiting list! What are they serving liquid gold? Supposedly this place is for the crème de la crème – CEOs tech moguls and policy wonks. Sounds like a prime breeding ground for Weyland Yutani types if you ask me. I wouldn't trust those guys as far as I could throw a Power Loader.

Who's Coming to the Party?

This soiree which I assume involves more caviar than actual conversation has already drawn a crowd. We're talking Secretary of State Marco Rubio SEC Chairman Paul Atkins... the whole crew. Makes you wonder what deals are being cut behind those closed doors doesn't it? It's like walking into the hive; you never know what's going to jump out.

Georgetown We Have a Problem

Executive Branch is opening in Georgetown a neighborhood probably already used to the weirdness of D.C. But let's be real this is a whole new level. It's supposed to be the new hot spot the place to be seen just like the Trump Hotel back in the day. Remember that? Ethical nightmare fuel that's what it was. And they're willingly stepping into the same trap. 'I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.'

Privacy is a Priority… for Some

Apparently they're being super picky about who gets in. No media types or just plain ol' lobbyists thank you very much. They want people who feel comfortable having 'conversations in privacy.' Translation: they don't want anyone asking the tough questions. Which in my experience is usually when things get REALLY interesting. And by interesting I mean Xenomorph level interesting.

Game Over Man? Not if We're Watching.

Look I'm not saying this is going to end with an acid bleeding alien tearing through the halls. But I've learned one thing: when the powerful and privileged start building walls it's usually because they're hiding something. And sometimes that 'something' is a whole lot worse than a bad investment. Stay frosty people. We're gonna need to keep a close eye on this one. Just in case. 'You know Burke I don't know which species is worse. You don't see them f***ing each other over for a goddamn percentage.'