Bean There, Driven That: My Take on Baidu's Robot Invasion!

Beep Beep! Robot Rides Coming to Europe?

Right so I heard this thing about… robots! Driving. Taxis. In Europe! Imagine that. No more grumpy taxi drivers asking 'Where to mate?' Just a cold metallic voice saying… well I don't know what they say! Probably something terribly efficient. I hope they don't replace the horn with something boring. A good 'parp' is essential isn't it? Remember that time I tried to drive from inside an armchair on top of my car? Good times. Maybe I should get one of these robotaxis to drive the armchair for me.

Switzerland? Turkey? Where's the Holiday?

Apparently this 'Baidu' company is setting up shop in Switzerland and Turkey. Switzerland! All those mountains! I wonder if the robotaxis can ski? And Turkey! Imagine trying to park one of those things in Istanbul! It'd be like trying to parallel park my Mini in a telephone booth. Utter chaos! Though thinking about it a robot taxi would be much better at driving in circles than I am. Remember when I tried to drive around that roundabout? Teddy nearly flew out the window!

Driverless? More Like Bean less!

They say these taxis are 'fully driverless.' Driverless! That means no driver! No one to blame when you accidentally spill your tea. Wait a minute. Maybe that's a good thing. Remember when I accidentally glued myself to the driver's seat? The bus driver wasn’t happy. Maybe I should teach Teddy to drive he always sits quietly.

Dubai Abu Dhabi and Now... My Local High Street?

This 'Apollo Go' thing is also heading to Dubai and Abu Dhabi. Fancy! Maybe I should invest. Imagine the possibilities! I could program one to follow me around carrying my shopping. Or to automatically honk at anyone who tries to cut in line at the cinema. The possibilities are endless! Like that time I tried to pay for my parking ticket with a sock! They never understood.

Robot Rivalries: Pony vs. Uber!

Apparently there's some competition too! Some 'Pony.AI' company is teaming up with 'Uber.' Sounds like a cartoon! It's a jungle out there! But is there any chance I could maybe… borrow one? Just for a little spin? I promise I’ll be careful. Mostly. Like the time I tried to paint my apartment for Christmas and ended up painting myself.

Will they have Teddy seats?

This is all quite exciting! Perhaps they’ll even be so kind as to include Teddy sized seats on these robotaxis. He deserves a comfortable commute too you know? Now if you’ll excuse me I must go and find some loose change for my bus fare. Unless of course I can convince one of these companies to let me ‘test’ their vehicles. It would be for the good of science of course.