Eat My Shorts Tesla! Dude Gets Busted for Molotov Mayhem!

Ay Caramba! Tesla's on Fire!

What's the deal man? So like I heard some bonehead in Las Vegas decided to have a barbecue... using Teslas! Five of 'em went up in smoke thanks to some Molotov cocktails and get this bullets! Talk about a crispy ride man. Turns out this is just one of a bunch of attacks on Tesla. This ain't just your average wedgie; the FBI's calling it "domestic terrorism!" Whoa settle down dudes.

Meet the Suspect: Sideshow Bob's Got Competition

This dude Paul Hyon Kim is in deep do do. They caught him because his getaway car was a Hyundai and it seems like he's not very good at lying. He tried to pull an insurance scam saying his tires were slashed and his car was stolen right after the Tesla roasting. But the cops are like 'Uh dude you never reported it.' Doh! I could've come up with a better story and I'm just a kid!

Bartman's Arsenal Ain't Got Nothin' on This!

When the cops raided Kim's pad they found a treasure trove of goodies that even Milhouse would drool over! We're talking AR style rifles AK style rifles handguns and enough ammo to start a small war. Plus they found a map with a supposed escape route from the Tesla place! This guy was more prepared than Principal Skinner for a school inspection. He was clearly trying to achieve the impossible!

Charges? Uh Houston We Have a Problem!

So Kim's facing some pretty heavy charges like unlawful possession of an unregistered firearm and arson. Sounds like he's gonna have plenty of time to perfect his Bart Simpson impression behind bars if you catch my drift. Lock him up and throw away the key! Unless he can bribe Chief Wiggum with donuts that is.

Elon's Got Beef... and a Twitter Account!

Of course Elon had to chime in on Twitter. He blamed the "legacy media propaganda" for brainwashing this Kim dude into doing it. He said the same media convinced assassins to target the president. Sounds like someone needs a Krusty Burger and a nap. Blaming the media? Now that's what I call "Don't have a cow man!"

More Tesla Troubles Than You Can Shake a Stick At!

Turns out there have been like 80 cases of Tesla vandalism and arson across the US and Canada! What's the deal with everyone picking on Elon's electric buggies? It's like Groundskeeper Willie declared war on electric vehicles! I better stick to skateboarding – at least until I figure out how to electrify it then watch out Springfield!