
What's Up Donkey? Trump's Truth Social Rant
Well howdy there! Shrek here reporting live from me swamp... and it seems there's trouble brewin' not too far away. Seems like ol' Trump's got his knickers in a twist about Canada. He went on that there Truth Social thingy rantin' and ravin' about how they're suckin' the U.S. dry like a vampire in a blood orange grove. He claims they're gettin' free military protection and a whole lotta subsidies. Sounds like someone needs a good mud bath to calm down!
Like an Onion: Layers of Trade Deficits
Now I ain't no fancy economist but even I can smell somethin' rotten in the state of... well not Denmark but Canada! Apparently this $200 billion figure Trump’s throwin' around is mostly 'cause of the U.S. spendin' money to defend everyone including those maple syrup lovers. And then there's the whole trade deficit thing. Last year the U.S. bought a whole lotta stuff from Canada – over $400 billion worth! Guess they really do make a mean beaver pelt hat eh?
Cars Lumber and...Friendship?
Trump went full ogre sayin' they don't need Canada's cars energy or lumber. 'We don't need ANYTHING they have,' he says 'other than their friendship.' Well ain't that sweet? Like givin' a dragon a mint. But then he turns around and says Canada needs EVERYTHING from them! Sounds like someone's been drinkin' too much swamp water. I'd say they need a friend to tell them they’ve got bad breath!
Commerce Secretary Sounds Off: 'They've been basically feeding off of us for decades upon decades upon decades'
Hold your horses! It gets worse! Some fancy pants Commerce Secretary called Canada a 'leech' and said they're 'feeding off' America with their socialist regime. 'Socialist regime?!' Now I don't know much about politics but that sounds like fightin' words! I hope someone's got some earplugs because this could get loud.
Canadian Pride: A Rejection of Trump?
So what does this all mean? Well it seems like all this fussin' and feudin' has stirred up some Canadian pride. After Trump started yappin' the Canadian election was seen as a smackdown of him. They started feelin' themselves with all that freedom and fairness! Makes you wonder if someone ought to get a room and work through some things? Fiona always says communication is key!
High Stakes at the White House
This meeting between Trump and that Carney fella is a big deal. It's like Donkey tryin' to have a serious conversation – you know somethin' goofy's gonna happen! Let's hope they can sort things out before someone gets turned into a donkey... or worse a politician! Guess we'll just have to wait and see if this ends with a 'happily ever after' or just another messy swamp fight. Shrek out!
michalw
He's making a deal? Sounds like he's trying to get Shrek's swamp!
pillarhu
As if Shrek would care about international trade! He's got bigger fish to fry... like dragons.
Quickwitted
This whole thing is a fairytale gone wrong. Where's Fiona when you need her?
alvinz95
I bet Lord Farquaad would have a solution. A very, very short solution.
mollychenson
Canada needs to build a wall... around itself to keep Trump out!
calandrauko
This is just like when Donkey tried to negotiate a better deal for the swamp! Disaster!
69THBLOCK
Can we just all agree that the real problem is Farquaad's ego?
awise107
Trade wars? I thought we were fighting dragons! Priorities people!
GoZharz
This whole situation is making me nervous! I need a waffle!