Somebody Once Told Me...Oracle's Cloud Deal is Gonna Roll 'Em!

Like an Onion Oracle's Got Layers of Cash!

Alright alright settle down! Shrek here bringin' ya the news straight from the swamp...or well the stock market. Seems Oracle that big tech fella just landed a cloud deal bigger than Donkey's ego. We're talkin' over $30 BILLION a year! That's more than enough to buy a lifetime supply of mud baths and maybe even a decent castle...though mine's just fine thank ya very much.

Safra Catz's Purr fect Plan

Apparently this Safra Catz lady is gonna be shoutin' it from the rooftops...or maybe just a company meetin'. She's all excited 'bout Oracle's 'MultiCloud database revenue' growin' faster than Pinocchio's nose when he's tellin' a whopper! This deal won't kick in 'til 2028 but hey good things take time like a proper ogre stew.

Donkey's Got Nothing on This Cloud Growth!

Oracle's shares are climbin' higher than Donkey tryin' to reach a star. Up 33% this year alone! Seems like this cloud business and all that artificial intelligence mumbo jumbo is payin' off. They're havin' their best run since before I even met Donkey...and that's sayin' somethin'!

AI? More Like Aye Aye Captain!

Now I ain't no tech wizard but even I can see Oracle's gettin' cozy with this AI thing. They're makin' deals left and right including somethin' called 'Stargate' with OpenAI and SoftBank. Sounds like somethin' out of a fairy tale if you ask me. Billions of dollars are being tossed around to make these robot brains smarter...I just hope they don't try to take over my swamp!

United Arab Emirates and IBM Join the Party

And they ain't stoppin' there! Oracle's spreadin' its wings all the way to the United Arab Emirates and even shakin' hands with IBM. It's like a giant techy game of musical chairs and Oracle's makin' sure they got a seat at every table.

Ogres and Cloud Deals: Who Knew?

So there ya have it. Oracle's makin' a killing with this cloud stuff. Who knew ogres like me would be reportin' on such fancy business? Just goes to show even a swamp dweller can appreciate a good pile of gold...or you know a solid investment opportunity. Now if you'll excuse me I've got a plate of grub worms with my name on it.