Donald Trump's Elon Musk Drama? More Like a Win for Germany's New Chancellor (and Me Watching From My Private Jet)

Like What Even Happened?

Okay so like I heard about this whole thing with the German Chancellor Friedrich Merz meeting with President Trump. Apparently Elon Musk decided to throw a party...of drama! Honestly can't he just stick to launching rockets and leave the politics to the politicians? But guess what? This 'distraction' actually helped Merz. It's like when I'm wearing a new lip kit and everyone's too busy admiring my pout to notice my outfit isn't perfectly coordinated. Genius right? #LifeHack #KylieCosmetics

Avoiding Drama is My Cardio...and Apparently Merz's Too!

So apparently just getting through a meeting with Trump without a Twitter meltdown is considered an achievement. I mean can you imagine the pressure? It's like trying to film a TikTok while Stormi's having a tantrum and your glam squad is screaming about lighting. Total chaos! Avoiding an 'escalation' is like the new black darling. Sophisticated AF.

Ukraine Tariffs and Other Things I Can't Even...

Okay so Merz had a whole list of things to talk about like strengthening ties between the U.S. and Germany tariffs (which sound boring AF) and supporting Ukraine. Honestly my mind wanders at 'tariffs.' But apparently Merz managed to get his points across including reminding Trump about the whole 'freeing Europe from the Nazis' thing. Talk about a history lesson! It's like 'Remember when you saved the world? Maybe do it again?' Smooth move Merz. Smooth move.

Grandpa's Birth Certificate: A Power Move?

This is where it gets interesting. Merz gifted Trump his grandpa's birth certificate! Like 'Hey you have German roots let's be friends!' It's like when I give people a Kylie Skin set to win them over. 'Here have some moisturizer now let's talk business.' But hey whatever works right? Plus Merz apparently highlighted Germany's plans for higher defense spending which I'm guessing made Trump happy. Money talks baby!

Far Right Party? Let's Just...Not.

So the article mentions Germany's far right party and apparently the Trump administration has been like flirting with them. Merz basically told them to back off. 'Don't get involved!' That's my kind of energy. Stay in your lane folks. No need to bring negativity into my perfectly curated life. #Blessed

A Home Run or a Hole in One? Either Way Merz Won

Overall the whole trip was a success. Apparently Trump even complimented Merz's English skills which is kind of a low bar but still. And they apparently have 'much in common.' I mean who doesn't love a good power meeting? A Trump trip to Berlin is already being planned which means more photo ops and potential drama! I'll be watching from my private jet sipping my favorite iced coffee and judging everyone's outfits. As one does! Byeeee!