
By the Gods Another Market Bloodbath!
Hmph. The mortals and their… finances. Tesla shares they plummet like Icarus from the sky. A 7.3% drop. A pitiful display. Down 38% for the year? This is no God of War it is a God of *Losses*. Such weakness reminds me of a young Atreus struggling to hold his own against a Draugr. Pathetic. But who am I to judge? I've seen worse falls from greater heights... like Baldur.
Trump's Tariffs: A Symphony of Chaos!
Trump the orange skinned mortal causes more upheaval than the Kraken unleashed. Pausing tariffs raising tariffs… a constant shift of the sands. Tesla caught in the storm rising one day falling the next. Up 23% then down down down. This 'volatility' they speak of is child's play compared to the chaos I've wrought across Olympus and Midgard. Still it seems even mortals can conjure a tempest.
Analysts Sharpen Their Blades
UBS Goldman Sachs Mizuho… these analysts they circle like vultures picking at the carcass of Tesla's stock. 'Margin impacts,' they whisper. 'Downward sloping,' they predict. Hmph. They remind me of the Valkyries forever judging. One even dares to say 'demand concerns'. They rate Tesla as SELL. These mortals are bold to assume they know the future. They would do well to remember 'Do not mistake my silence for lack of knowledge.'
Musk's Troubles Multiply
Ah Musk. A mortal with ambition like I once was. But ambition without control is a dangerous weapon. Brand deterioration declining deliveries protests 'criminal acts'... it seems the Fates are not smiling upon him. And his allegiance to Trump a further entanglement in the threads of destiny. A tangled web indeed. The Norns would be proud.
The Tariff Beast Rears Its Head
China Mexico Europe… tariffs from all corners. Tesla's precious parts sourced from afar now burdened with levies. The weight of these costs it crushes the company like the crushing jaws of a Stone Ancient. Sales growth once a beacon of hope now threatened by the looming shadows of financial ruin. This reminds me of the time I had to fight Cronos... but without the cool sword. This tariff situation it's not cool at all.
Short Sellers Rejoice! (For Now)
The short sellers those vultures they feast on Tesla's decline. Their bets on doom finally paying off. 80.5 million shares shorted a $17.9 billion gamble. They remind me of the gamblers in the Bifrost tavern always willing to risk it all. But beware mortals. Fortunes can change faster than you can say 'Boy!'. The wheel of fate turns for all of us. Even short sellers.
mburkhard
Tesla will need the Blades of Chaos to get out of this mess!
pinkunicorn
Boy, this is worse than fighting Zeus all over again!
djmonster
Hmm, the market shifts more violently than my mood swings...
bangla46
These short sellers are nothing more than carrion birds.
asetviral
Hmph, another stock drops, another head rolls. Business as usual.
frosty3007
If I were Musk, I'd start a new company... perhaps one that builds actual chariots.
babie
This Musk fellow needs a Spartan rage to deal with Trump's tariffs.
bdboop
Analysts! They speak with forked tongues!