Figma Files for IPO: Bears. Beets. Billion-Dollar Bets!

A Schrute Farms Stock Tip (Sort Of)

As Assistant Regional Manager (Assistant *to* the Regional Manager) of Dunder Mifflin and volunteer Sheriff's Deputy I Dwight K. Schrute am uniquely qualified to assess risk. And let me tell you this Figma IPO is less 'risk' and more 'potential for explosive growth,' like my prize winning beets after a good rain. Figma you see is like the beet of design software – versatile essential and strangely appealing to a select group of people. Apparently they want to trade under the symbol 'FIG'… FIG! As in short for 'Figgy Pudding,' which is what Michael Scott's brain is made of. This should be interesting.

Adobe Acquisition? That's What She Didn't Say...

Remember when Adobe tried to swallow Figma whole for a cool $20 billion? Turns out even the British regulators bless their bureaucratic hearts saw through that. They said NO. Can you imagine the beets that $20B could buy? They ended up paying Figma a *cool* $1B termination fee. A BILLION DOLLARS! That’s more than I’ve made in my entire life. Of course I’m not in it for the money. I’m in it for the power. And beets. Mostly beets. The breakup was a real beet down for Adobe! Now Figma is walking away with a cool billion in cash to spend in the IPO. I wonder if I can get a few shares for Mose?

Show Me the Money (Beets)

The numbers the NUMBERS! First quarter revenue jumped 46%! Forty six! That's almost half! Net income? Up from $13.5 million to $44.9 million. My beet farm wishes it had that kind of growth potential. They've got over a thousand customers paying at least $100,000 a year. One hundred thousand! That's like an entire warehouse full of beet seeds! And get this: Amazon Google Microsoft Netflix... All on board! This is like the Justice League of tech companies except instead of fighting crime they're... designing stuff. Bah still impressive.

Global Domination (Through Design)

More than half of Figma's revenue comes from outside the U.S. They're not just selling beet futures in Scranton people! They're taking their design revolution GLOBAL! Just like Schrute Farms should be! Although... international beet related regulations are a nightmare. Let's just stick to Scranton for now. Maybe once I’m the Regional Manager I’ll be able to figure all of this out.

From College Dropout to IPO Kingpin: A Lesson in Thiel osophy

Dylan Field the CEO dropped out of Brown University. Brown! What kind of name is that for a university?! To pursue...entrepreneurial projects. Sounds like a load of manure to me! He even got a Thiel Fellowship. Apparently you get money for this fellowship. A fellowship to not go to school! That's how you become successful these days. I stuck with Dunder Mifflin and look at me now. Assistant *to the* Regional Manager. Anyway this Field fellow is the big cheese at Figma holding the majority of the voting power. It pays to sell out and drop out I guess!

Public Money Public Problems (But Mostly Public Opportunity!)

Field says going public is about community sharing in the ownership of Figma. Sounds like socialism to me but what do I know? He wants to take big swings including acquisitions! And there's a whole list of Venture firms waiting to get paid. Index Ventures Greylock Kleiner Perkins Sequoia... all hoping for a payday. This is what happens when you stray from the beet field. But despite all my skepticism this IPO could be a game changer. Maybe I should invest. Then I can buy a bigger beet farm. And finally purchase that bear mace I've been eyeing.