The Tariff Awakens: Trump's Trade Threats Risk a Galaxy Far, Far Away (From Profit)

A Disturbance in the Trade Force

The Force is strong with this one but I sense…impatience. President Trump like a young Padawan is eager to wield power threatening Apple and the EU with tariffs. Trade experts those irritating rebels claim this is due to stalled negotiations. As if negotiations ever truly go as planned! 'Trump is not wrong that the EU has been less forthcoming than other countries,' one Jedi Master—er senior counsel—Josh Teitelbaum said. He added the EU has good reason to be reluctant. Such defiance! Perhaps a demonstration of the Force is needed.

Apple's Wretched Hive of Scum and Tariffs

Apple that shiny bauble is now caught in the crossfire. A 25% tariff on iPhones not made in the U.S.? Such a demand is…unsettling. And this investigation into national security threats related to tech? A clumsy move! It risks dragging Apple further into this galactic mess. The Emperor—sorry the President—'has a mechanism to make good on this threat.' It seems that the ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of tariffs.

Europe Strikes Back (With Industrial Goods)

Unlike Asia which supplies mostly consumer trinkets Europe is a vital source of industrial components for American manufacturers. 'Europe was stable and steady,' reports Andy Abbott CEO of Atlantic Container Line. 'A big tariff on European imports will backfire making American products more expensive to produce.' Such short sightedness! It is as if the Emperor himself were planning this strategy. Perhaps he needs a new advisor…someone who understands the true power of the dark side…and global trade.

The Reshoring Menace

These tariffs could undermine efforts to bring manufacturing back to the U.S. Manufacturers are practically begging the administration to consider the costs. Container rates to Europe are already a third of U.S. import rates so reduced European imports could raise export rates further burdening American products. It's a trap! A self inflicted wound if you will. This is not the way I keep telling them but do they ever listen?

A New Hope...For Disaster

'The EU is a significant trading partner and a 50% tariff would potentially cause economic harm and the EU could retaliate which would further escalate the economic harm,' warns Timothy Brightbill of Wiley. 'It's a dangerous situation.' Indeed! It is as dangerous as facing me in a lightsaber duel. But unlike those hapless rebels the EU has the potential to inflict real damage. They are not to be underestimated.

These Are Not the Droids You're Looking For...Unless You're in Trade

Dan Anthony of Trade Partnership Worldwide claims that the impact of a 50% tariff would vary across the U.S. but would be felt state to state. 'Implementing a 50% tariff represents an effective rate increase of 20 200x depending on the state,' he moans. Brightbill notes that the EU has many trade barriers and these trade negotiations could provide opportunities for both agricultural and digital trade. But who can be sure? "So it will be very difficult to reach a consensus,' Brightbill adds. It would appear the future of trade is dark indeed...