The Emperor Protects! Chamber of Commerce Begs Trump to Avert Economic Destruction... Again!

A Disturbance in the Force (of the Economy)

I sense a great disturbance in the Force... or rather the economy. The U.S. Chamber of Commerce in their infinite wisdom (or perhaps desperation) is practically groveling before the Trump administration demanding a "tariff exclusion process." They claim these tariffs are choking the life out of small businesses threatening a full blown recession. As if the Force wasn't already troubled enough now we have trade wars to worry about. These bureaucrats and their endless squabbles are as irritating as sand; coarse rough irritating and it gets everywhere.

Begging for Scraps from the Empire

Suzanne Clark CEO of this... Chamber is begging for automatic tariff lifts on goods "that cannot be produced in the U.S." A novel idea! Perhaps they should have foreseen this when they aligned themselves with the Empire... I mean the administration. She also requests a process for businesses to escape tariffs if they can prove "significant risks to U.S. employment." Risks? I find their lack of faith disturbing. If only they knew the power of the Dark Side... erm of tax cuts!

Irreparable Harm? Or Just a Little Motivation?

Clark whines about "irreparable harm" to small businesses. Irreparable? Please. Fear will keep the local systems in line. A little economic pressure might just motivate these small businesses to become more… efficient. After all a galaxy ruled by efficiency is a galaxy that runs smoothly. Or at least that's what Palpatine always said.

No Court? Only Tax Cuts!

Interesting that the Chamber who sued the Biden administration more than 20 times is opting out of a legal battle this time. "Courts take a long time," she says. So they prefer the quick fix... like a Sith Lord blasting away their problems. But no! The administration is offering tax cuts which according to Stephen Miller the White House deputy chief of staff is the true "relief" for small businesses. Perhaps he is trying to rule the galaxy as well.

Resistance is Futile... Unless You Invest!

Miller in his infinite political wisdom (or perhaps just echoing his master's voice) states that companies investing in the U.S. will face no tariff liability. So the message is clear: Join the Dark Side (invest in the U.S.) or face the consequences. The Emperor would be proud. Though he might have preferred a bit more... persuasive force.

The Dark Side of Tax Relief

So there we have it. The Chamber begs the administration offers tax cuts and the small businesses tremble. It is a dark day for the galaxy... or at least for CNBC. But fear not! For as long as there are tax cuts there is hope... of even greater control. Now if you'll excuse me I have a galaxy to run... and some rebel scum to crush. Perhaps the tax cut money can fund more super weapons! "I find your lack of faith disturbing."