What in Tarnation is Happening to My Brew! Trump's Policies Ruining Beer?!

Ogres and Onions...and Beer?

Well hello there! Shrek here reporting live from my swamp. Usually I'm all about onions and keeping the peace but even I can't ignore what's brewin' in the world of... *ahem*... fancy people drinks. Seems like this here Constellation Brands they make beer for city folk is having a bit of a pickle. A pickle more sour than my disposition before Fiona came along!

Trump's Policies Hit Harder Than Donkey's Kick

Now I ain't one for politics but even I can see what's going on. Apparently this 'Trump' fella's tariffs – that's like taxes on stuff coming from other places like Mexico – and his whole 'stay away' attitude towards immigrants are makin' folks nervous. Bill Newlands the big cheese at Constellation is sayin' that Hispanic consumers are spendin' less. And guess what? That means less beer money! It's like Donkey not gettin' his waffles – a tragedy I tell ya!

Hispanic Thirst Dries Up Like a Desert

This Newlands fella says half of Constellation's beer sales are thanks to Hispanic folks. They're worried about jobs and immigration so they're cuttin' back on restaurants clothes and even… *gasp*… travel! And yeah beer's down on the list. Seems these consumers aren't partying at social gatherings like they used to where they enjoy good brews.

Ogre Sized Problems for Beer Barons

So Constellation gave a gloomy forecast for the future. They're blamin' the tariffs especially the ones on aluminum 'cause their canned beer from Mexico is gettin' pricier. They're tryin' to sell off their cheapo wines and focus on the fancy stuff. But even then the stock ain't doin' too hot. It's like tryin' to make a silk purse out of a sow's ear I tell ya!

Modelo Especial: Even Ogres Love This Brew!

Still it ain't all doom and gloom! Seems like Constellation's reachin' out to folks who ain't Hispanic and their Modelo Especial beer is doin' pretty darn well. Maybe they should try marketin' to ogres? We know how to throw a party! Though our parties usually involve mud wrestling and questionable swamp concoctions...

That'll Do Beer. That'll Do

So there you have it. Politics tariffs and nervous folks are makin' a dent in the beer business. Looks like even ogres gotta pay attention to what's happenin' in the world 'cause it might just affect our… *burp*… beverage choices. Now if you'll excuse me I'm gonna go find Donkey and share a pint of… *something*… from my swamp. Just don't ask what's in it.