A Dark Lord's Take: Microsoft's Fiscal Forecast - Is the Force Weakening?

A Quarter Not Strong With Them

The Emperor has commanded I oversee this… *Microsoft* financial report. The projected earnings per share are $3.22 and revenue $68.42 billion. A paltry sum compared to the might of the Empire but I digress. It seems their revenue growth is slowing; a mere 10.6%. The last time they grew this slowly I was… never mind. Suffice it to say their weakness is disturbing.

Tariffs: An Economic Death Star?

These tariffs… President Trump's new tariffs loom like a squadron of Star Destroyers. Former Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer calls them "not good." A pathetic understatement. Nadella claims they'll 'adjust'. Adjust? Such passive language. They should be using their AGGRESSIVE feelings and FORCING a better outcome. Perhaps I should offer them a demonstration of the Force.

The AI Gambit: A Desperate Move?

Microsoft committed $80 billion to AI data centers. An impressive yet foolhardy expenditure? Their CFO Amy Hood anticipates a spending slowdown in 2026. As if that future is guaranteed! Their Azure cloud services not tied to AI fell short. A lack of vision clearly. I sense a great disturbance in the Force as if millions of investors suddenly cried out in terror...

Azure's Cloud: Is It a Trap?

Even Bank of America and BMO have lowered their Azure growth estimates. It seems Microsoft's ambition is outpacing its grasp. Like those rebel scum who thought they could destroy the Death Star with a single proton torpedo they overestimate their own capabilities.

OpenAI: An Alliance with Potential or Another Apprentice?

Their relationship with OpenAI has… *adjusted*. They have the right of first refusal but not always the obligation to provide computing capacity. A curious arrangement. Meanwhile OpenAI joins forces with Oracle and SoftBank. Alliances shift like the sands of Tatooine. This could prove... interesting.

The Analysts' Call: A Waste of My Time?

These 'analysts'. They will issue guidance and discuss the results. A pointless exercise. Their pronouncements are as predictable as the Emperor's budget cuts. Still I must attend... perhaps I can glean some useful information. Or at the very least find someone to blame for this… *situation*. The Force is with them... for now.