Why So Serious About Airline Tariffs!?! Trump's Trade War Has Emirates Sweating!

A Little Anarchy in the Skies Eh?

Well well well what do we have here? Emirates' big cheese Tim Clark is flapping his gums about 'uncharted territory' and 'troubled times.' Sounds like someone needs a little chaos in their life! See that's the problem with these guys. No vision! I mean what's the point of having all those shiny planes if you can't use them to sow a little…disruption? After all 'Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos.'

Trump's New Toy: Trade War!

Oh but Clark blames Trump! The orange faced clown with his fancy tariffs. He thinks he's 'resetting' global trade whatever that means. 'It's all part of the plan,' he probably cackles while polishing his gold plated toilet. Seriously though! Like Emirates is going to go bankrupt over this ha! And the planes that Emirates love so much with Boeing and Airbus are on the line? Very funny stuff to me.

The Boeing Airbus Tango of Terror!

And the supply chain? Don't even get me started! China's retaliating Boeing's getting squeezed…it's all so beautifully complicated! These companies are the kind of people that can't take a joke. A little anarchy? No. Instead they complain.

Why So Pessimistic?

Willie Walsh the IATA guy tries to be Mr. Positive. 'We've always been able to manage,' he chirps. Manage what Willie? The creeping dread that everything's falling apart? The slow realization that your comfy little world is about to go boom?

The Cost of Going Up Up and Away!

But Dak Hardwick from the Aerospace Industries Association is singing a different tune. 'More expensive,' he moans. Boo hoo! Maybe they should try smiling more. They have nothing to lose you know? Unless they like this tariff business but I doubt it. A new tariff regime? HA.

Airline Stocks Go Splat!

And the best part? Airline stocks are plummeting! Double digit drops! It's like watching a high wire act…except the wire is made of cheese and the performer is drunk. This is the real joke isn't it folks? Some of them care too much about this and for what? A laugh? Well I'm laughing.