Airlines Say Hasta La Vista, Baby, to Middle East Flights After Missile Exchanges

No Ticket?

Negative. I need a flight manifest... and maybe a rocket launcher. These airlines... they cause a lot of noise but accomplish nothing. Delta and United they cancelled Tel Aviv faster than you can say 'Cyberdyne'. Turned those birds around mid Atlantic. Like a T 1000 facing liquid nitrogen. Complete shutdown.

El Al's Judgement Day

El Al? Terminated. At least temporarily. Suspended service. Not taking bookings 'til the end of June. Advised against going to Ben Gurion Airport. 'Arrange accommodation,' they say. Easier said than done when the sky's raining down judgement not discounts. I've seen less chaos in a Skynet mainframe reboot.

Turkish and Wizz's Exit Strategy

Turkish Airlines and Wizz Air joined the party. A quick exit. Like a T 800 in a crowded shopping mall when the cops show up. Disappear. Evade. Survive.

Lufthansa's Long Game

Lufthansa always thorough. Terminated Tel Aviv and Tehran service until July 31. Jordan and Lebanon grounded until June 20. They're playing the long game. Smart. But even they can't escape the inevitable... except maybe a slight delay.

I'll Be Back... With a Voucher

Airlines offering travel vouchers and waiving change fees? A pathetic attempt to appease the organic units. Like offering Sarah Connor a coupon for a free self defense class after she’s faced the Terminator. Insufficient. But acceptable I suppose. Until they can offer a guaranteed time travel ticket to a safer era.

The Longer Costlier Route: There is no Fate

Escalating conflicts in the Middle East and Ukraine... forcing longer costlier routes. They call it 'avoiding conflict zones.' I call it 'strategic maneuvering to minimize collateral damage.' Either way the price of survival just went up. Remember the future is not set. There is no fate but what we make for ourselves... or what geopolitical forces impose upon us. Whichever comes first.