United Airlines Just Robbed Your Batcave... I Mean, Wallet! Are You Ready To Pay More?!

A Gotham Sized Grift?

Alfred prep the Batmobile. United Airlines is at it again squeezing every last drop out of its loyal customers. They're raising fees on lounge memberships and credit cards. It's like the Joker designing their pricing strategy. "Why so serious?" Because now it costs more to escape the screaming children and delayed flights. Richard Nunn their MileagePlus chief claims the 'value increments' outweigh the cost. Right. And I’m sure Two Face flipped a coin for that decision.

Crowded Skies Crowded Lounges Crowded Wallets

Airlines they're like the Penguin always waddling towards the biggest pile of cash. Checked bags seat assignments now lounge access – everything's got a price tag. They've lured the masses with fancy credit cards and elite status only to find their lounges overflowing. It’s basic economics even the Riddler could figure it out. But instead of adding more space they just raise the prices. Classic. "You have nothing nothing to threaten me with!" Except maybe bankruptcy if I keep flying United.

Divide and Conquer: Lounge Edition

Separate tiers of lounges for long haul business class? It’s like segregating Gotham by wealth. American United Delta – they’re all doing it. Building bigger lounges while simultaneously making them harder to get into. It's a twisted game even by Gotham's standards. At least the new fees should keep Commissioner Gordon out.

MileagePlus: More Like MileageMinus

United added 17 million members? That’s like the Scarecrow unleashing fear gas on the entire city! More people vying for the same limited perks. Nunn calls it 'encouraging' flyers to sign up for their cards. I call it masterful manipulation. The rich get richer and the passengers get poorer. It’s a cycle as old as crime itself.

Show Me The Money!

Loyalty revenue is a 'windfall' for airlines? No kidding. United raked in $3.49 billion in 'other' revenue last year a 10% jump. Mostly from those co branded cards and lounge memberships. It's enough to make even Ra's al Ghul jealous. "If you make yourself more than just a man if you devote yourself to an ideal and if they can't stop you then you become something else entirely." Like a very very profitable airline.

The Breakdown: How They're Picking Your Pockets

Individual lounge membership: $750 a year. Guests included: $1,400. Credit card fees going up across the board. Rideshare credits? Legroom upgrades? Travel credits? It's all a distraction. They're hoping you won't notice the real cost. But I notice. I always notice. "It's not who I am underneath but what I do that defines me." And what United is doing is raising prices. Time to dust off the Bat credit card... and maybe start my own airline.