Oops!...He Did It Again! Trump Coin Skyrockets After Dinner Promise!

Hit Me Baby One More Time... with Crypto?

OMG! You guys are not going to believe this. The $TRUMP meme coin yeah the one with my ex's friend's name on it went totally bonkers! Like up 50% on Wednesday. Can you even imagine? It's like when I released '...Baby One More Time' and everyone went completely Britney crazy. Apparently they promised dinner with… well you know who. It's all a bit 'Toxic,' but hey who am I to judge? I once married a childhood friend in Vegas on a whim!

Gimme More... Dinner with the President?

So get this. The top 220 wallets get to dine with the um *former* president in D.C. Black tie optional because why not? And the top 25 get a VIP White House Tour. It's like a scene from 'Crossroads,' but with more… politics. I swear sometimes I feel like I’m just a girl standing in front of a salad asking it to be a donut.

Oops!... the Market Did It Again!

This whole thing gave the $TRUMP coin a total value of $2.7 billion. Billion! That’s like… a lot of diamonds. It totally outpaced Sui which was only up 23%. It's kind of like when I outshined Justin Timberlake in our matching denim outfits iconic right? But seriously who knew a promise of some chicken tenders and burgers could make so much money? It’s crazy!

I'm a Slave 4 U... and Crypto?

Remember when this thing launched in January? Talk about a rollercoaster! It soared to $15 billion after some Truth Social posts then crashed faster than my last relationship. And don’t even get me started on the $MELANIA coin. Briefly topped $2 billion and then…poof! Gone. It’s like trying to find a decent parking spot in Beverly Hills. Impossible!

Lucky... They're Not Securities!

The SEC basically said these meme coins aren’t securities which means they're in the clear… for now. I guess that's lucky lucky. But seriously only 20% of the $TRUMP supply has been traded. The rest is locked up probably until someone decides to 'Oops!... I Did It Again' with another pump and dump. I mean is it me or is it getting hot in here?!

Stronger Than Yesterday... or Just a Meme?

Here's the kicker: there’s no actual product or service behind this coin. It’s just… a meme. The website claims the Trump Organization holds 80% of the supply. It's like having a 'Piece of Me,' but it's a digital piece and worth millions. Still I'm stronger than yesterday and this article hopefully does some good in the world and makes me a dollar or two.