Hyrule Alert: Missile Mayhem in the Middle East!

A Kingdom Far Far Away...

Greetings citizens of Hyrule! Princess Zelda here reporting live from… well not Hyrule. It seems trouble is brewing in a land called the Middle East specifically involving countries named Iran the United States and Qatar. Apparently there's been a bit of a… *ahem*… "powerful and destructive missile strike" according to Iranian forces. Honestly sounds like something Ganondorf would cook up. Remember that time he tried to take over Hyrule Castle with giant laser beams? Good times... for him maybe. Anyway the target was apparently the Al Udeid Air Base in Qatar. Let's hope their defenses are stronger than a Bokoblin's club!

Doha Dodges a Bullet (or Several)

Explosions rocked the skies over Doha Qatar's capital like a rogue Lynel crashing through a marketplace. Thankfully the Qatar Defense Ministry bless their hearts claims their air defenses intercepted the attack. No deaths or injuries reported! A true testament to their skills I'd love to have them over to defend Hyrule Castle sometime. Meanwhile the U.S. forces are apparently bracing for further attacks in Iraq and Bahrain. Seems everyone's on edge – more than a Cucco in a cooking pot! We should send them some fairy tears just in case.

Tit for Tat: A Ballad of Bombs and Retaliation

Now the root of this chaos seems to stem from a tit for tat exchange. Allegedly the U.S. launched B 2 bombers and cruise missiles at nuclear development facilities in Iran a few days prior. Now Iran is striking back harder than a moblin in a dark cave! It reminds me of the time Link accidentally broke all the pots in my room – I retaliated by making him clean up all the goo from the Water Temple! Hopefully these nations can find a less… explosive… way to resolve their differences.

Oil Prices Plummet: Is This Good for Hyrule?

In other news the price of crude oil reportedly fell after the attack. Now I'm no Goron merchant but I'm guessing this has something to do with… well *everything*. Will this affect the price of Lon Lon Ranch milk? Or the cost of arrows for Link? I will consult Impa. Regardless the world is interconnected in ways even I Princess of Hyrule struggle to comprehend sometimes.

Trump in the Situation Room: Sounds Familiar...

Apparently President Trump and his advisors were huddled in the White House's Situation Room monitoring the situation. Sounds like a council of elders in a tense town meeting. I imagine they were saying things like "We must act with haste!" and "What is our next move?" Maybe they should consult with the Sheikah Slate for some ancient wisdom. I'm sure Robbie has some useful tips in there somewhere!

Qatar's Outraged: 'Hmph!' Indeed!

Qatar's Foreign Ministry spokesman issued a statement condemning the attack as a “flagrant violation” of their sovereignty and international law. Basically they're saying "Hmph! We shall not stand for this!" I can certainly understand their frustration. Having someone violate your airspace is worse than a swarm of keese in the castle library! The spokesman also declared they reserve the right to respond. Let's hope they choose wisdom and diplomacy over brute force. After all violence is never the answer unless you're fighting Ganon then it's totally fine.