Why So Serious About the Stock Market? Trade Deals and Twisted Smiles!

A Little Anarchy in the Economy

Well well well... look who's playing the game. Seems like those silly suits in Washington are at it again with their 'trade talks'. The S&P 500 is on a 'comeback' they say like some washed up comedian trying to sell the same old jokes. They actually believe the economy is strong enough to 'weather' Trump's tariffs. HA! You know it reminds me of a certain bat thinking he could 'fix' Gotham. Oh the delusion!

Recession? Why So Serious?

Apparently this 'jobs report' has everyone thinking they can dodge a recession. As if! It’s all just a game isn’t it? A rigged game! And China's 'willingness' to talk? Please. They're playing you all like a fiddle. 'Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos.'

Euphoria? More Like Hysteria!

Art Hogan some 'chief market strategist,' thinks a deal with any of these countries (Mexico Canada Japan or Eurozone) would be 'monumental.' Monumentally boring! He's hoping for a first deal on the tape. I'm hoping for a good explosion. Now that's entertainment!

The Long Game: Still Depressing

But hold on! Even with all this 'strength,' some are still worried about a slowdown. The technical charts look 'troubling,' says Katie Stockton. There is still long term resistance. 'Damage to the charts has been done'. Doesn't that just bring a tear to your eye? It's like watching a building burn…beautiful!

Fed's Fiddling and Disney's Dreams

The Fed's gonna 'meet' next week. They think everything is fine because 'inflation remains elevated'. Oh these clowns. They are so predictable. Then there's Disney releasing results. You know what Disney is? A bunch of happy go lucky people singing and dancing. Let's see if they smile when the market crashes.

The Punchline is Coming...

So the Dow is up the S&P is up the Nasdaq is up. Everyone's happy. For now. But remember folks it’s all a house of cards. And I my friends am holding the Joker card. Just wait for the punchline… It's going to be hilarious! 'Why don't we cut you up into little pieces and feed you to your pooches? Then we'll see how loyal a hungry dog really is.' Ha! Ha! Ha!