Are Core Bonds the LAST LAUGH for Your Portfolio? You WON'T Believe What Experts Are Saying!

Why So Serious About the Market?

Alright folks let's talk about chaos! It seems our dear Gotham—err I mean the stock market—has been a tad…unpredictable lately. Tariffs trade wars the whole shebang! Makes you wanna just watch the world burn doesn't it? But some 'experts'—oh how I loathe that word—are saying core bonds might be the saving grace. You know those boring 'responsible' investments that are supposed to keep you afloat when the ship hits the iceberg. 'Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos.'

Bonds: The White Knight (Or Just a Clown in Disguise?)

Apparently these core bonds are supposed to be the Batman to your portfolio's Gotham. When stocks take a nosedive—and trust me they will—these bonds are supposed to swoop in and save the day. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Remember 2022? The market doesn't always play by the rules. Sometimes even the 'heroes' let you down. And who knows maybe I'll just decide to blow up the bond market for a laugh. Why so serious right?

High Quality Bonds: A Real Hoot!

But wait there's more! These 'high quality bonds'—Treasuries corporate bonds government agency bonds—might even help you survive a recession. Imagine that! As if money can protect you from the madness of humanity. Paul Olmsted from Morningstar says these bonds outsmarted the S&P 500 during the 2020 Covid freakout and the Great Recession. Well la di da! Maybe they're not so boring after all. Or maybe they're just setting you up for a bigger fall. The best part about chaos is that it's fair.

Portfolio Positioning: A Joke in Itself!

So how much of this 'core bond' business should you actually buy? Olmsted suggests that if you have a portfolio that is 60% equities and 40% fixed income a whole 30% of the fixed income part should be in core bonds. Rick Wedell from RFG Advisory is also a fan especially when things get scary. Apparently there is no other asset that displays that 'inverse correlation' with equities when things go south. But here's the punchline: what if things go sideways instead? Huh? Didn't think of that did ya?

Yields: The Punchline

And for those of you shaking in your boots about the bond market's recent drama Barry Glassman from Glassman Wealth Services says to remember those attractive yields. More income cushion! Yay! But remember my friends the bigger the cushion the harder the fall. Now now show them the smile! Act happy! This will all make sense later.

The Funniest Funds in Town!

Here are some of the top rated funds you should look at so you can be in on the joke. The Baird Aggregate Bond Fund the Fidelity Investment Grade Bond Fund the John Hancock Investment Grade Bond Fund the JPMorgan Core Bond Fund and the TCW Core Fixed Income Fund. But remember folks past performance is no guarantee of future…entertainment. 'Madness is like gravity all it needs is a little push.'