Shishishi! 'Thunderbolts*' Blows Up the Box Office! Time for Meat!

Meat! And Money!?

Hey it's me Luffy! I heard some weirdos called 'Thunderbolts*' made a whole lot of money! Like enough to buy a mountain of meat! Apparently they made like $76 million in just one weekend! Shishishi! That's a lot of treasure! Some guy named Paul said it's making May super awesome. I dunno about that but more money means more food right?

The Gum Gum Struggle is Real!

Apparently some other movies didn't do so hot. Some 'Fall Guy' fell flat on his face only getting $28 million. That's like… barely enough for a small snack for me! And someone said Marvel movies haven't been as amazing since some 'Endgame' thing. Sounds tough! Being a pirate is way easier just gotta find the One Piece!

Rubber Brain Analysis (Not Really)

Some smart guy named Shawn said movies have 'tailwinds and headwinds.' Sounds like sailing the Grand Line! Sometimes the sea is calm sometimes it's full of giant sea kings! He thinks 'Thunderbolts*' is a win for Marvel. I guess that's good? More good movies means more days off for everyone to cook me meat!

Junior Varsity Heroes? Sounds Yummy!

They're calling these 'Thunderbolts*' guys 'junior varsity characters.' Are they like baby sea kings? Do they taste like meat? Apparently people who aren't huge fans like them too! Someone said it shows what Marvel can do when they're not being lazy. Maybe they should just hire Sanji to direct! He'd make sure everyone is full of energy!

Rotten Tomatoes? Sounds Disgusting!

These 'Thunderbolts*' guys got an 88% on something called 'Rotten Tomatoes.' That sounds awful! Who wants to eat rotten tomatoes? Luckily regular people gave it a 94%. That's much better! People like good stuff just like I like meat!

Long Term Playability? Can I Eat It?

Another guy Paul again said 'Thunderbolts*' is gonna be like some 'Minecraft Movie' and 'Sinners.' I have no idea what those are but he thinks they'll keep making money for a while. If they share some of that money with me I promise to keep protecting everyone! Shishishi!