Credit Card Gods Offer BOONS! Will You Accept Their Challenges?

A Spartan's Guide to Credit Card Conquest

Boy! The world of mortals is filled with temptations and fleeting opportunities. These so called 'credit cards' offer boons but they demand tribute! They speak of 'welcome bonuses,' rewards for those who prove their financial might. Ignore these fleeting offers and you will know the sting of regret. I. DO. NOT. REGRET. But YOU might!

Chase Sapphire: A True Warrior's Reward

The Chase Sapphire Preferred card... it echoes with tales of past glory. They offer 100,000 bonus points for those who spend $5,000 within three months. A test of strength indeed! This offer they say rivals that of 2021. Hmph. A warrior must always seize the advantage. This card... it is a weapon. Use it wisely lest it turn against you! Like the Blades of Chaos it can bring destruction or victory.

Capital One Venture: A Fool's Errand?

Capital One Venture card promises $250 in travel credits plus 75,000 bonus miles. A tempting song like that of the Sirens! But beware the travel credit lasts only a year. The Chase Sapphire Preferred card provides better value. Do not be blinded by fleeting promises. Choose wisely lest you become another mindless drone of Ares!

American Express Business Platinum: Riches for the Ruthless

The American Express Business Platinum Card demands $20,000 in spending for 150,000 points. A hefty price! But it also offers a $500 statement credit for flights. This is a game for the cunning for those who wield wealth as a weapon. The annual fee? A mere trifle for those who understand true power. This is not for the faint of heart. Only those who understand the true cost of ambition should tread this path.

Airline Cards: Soaring to New Heights or Crashing and Burning?

United American Airlines... they dangle miles like bait before a hungry wolf. 80,000 miles 90,000 miles even 125,000! The New United Explorer Quest and Business cards offer boons for the loyal. But remember loyalty is a weakness. Use these cards for your advantage then cast them aside when their usefulness is done. Just as I did with the Gods of Olympus!

Hotel Cards: A Bed Fit for a God... or a Pauper

IHG Marriott Bonvoy... they offer points for those who seek comfort in mortal establishments. 200,000 points! 155,000 points! 185,000 points! Enough to drown yourself in luxury... or merely survive another night. Choose your battles wisely Spartan. Even a God needs a good night's sleep before a war. The IHG One Rewards Premier Business Credit Card has the biggest bonus and the Marriott Bonvoy cards while lesser are worthy of consideration for any 'mid tier' card... whatever that means.