Palo Alto Networks Chases AI Security Like Indy Chases the Ark! A Tech Adventure!

Another Acquisition? Fortune and Glory Kid Fortune and Glory!

Alright folks gather 'round! It seems Palo Alto Networks is at it again snatching up Protect AI like I snatch priceless artifacts from booby trapped temples. They're calling it an 'acquisition,' but I suspect there's a bit more 'finders keepers' to this story. Word on the street is that Palo Alto Networks is throwing down an undisclosed sum for Protect AI a scrappy startup that's all about keeping AI and machine learning apps safe and sound. This deal is expected to close by the first quarter of fiscal year 2026. I have a bad feeling about this…

AI's New Clothes: A Naked Vulnerability?

According to Anand Oswal some bigwig at Palo Alto Networks this move is all about building AI applications with 'comprehensive security.' Sounds like they're finally realizing that these fancy AI systems have more holes than a sieve. These rapidly built AI ecosystems are like hastily constructed temples – impressive on the outside but filled with more traps than a Saturday matinee. It appears as I have said before that they are digging in the wrong place!

Prisma AIRS: More Than Just Hot Air?

This acquisition will apparently fold Protect AI's solutions into Palo Alto's new Prisma AIRS platform. Prisma AIRS? Sounds like something you'd use to ward off evil spirits not cyber threats. If you ask me they need to make sure this platform is as sturdy as the bridges I've crossed otherwise it'll all come crashing down. Like that bridge in 'Temple of Doom' without the convenient rope cutting.

Protect AI's CEO Speaks: It Belongs in a Museum! (Or Palo Alto Networks)

Ian Swanson the head honcho at Protect AI claims this move will allow them to 'scale our mission of making the AI landscape more secure.' Well that's one way to put it. I'm guessing he's also hoping for a good retirement package and maybe a lifetime supply of fedoras. This reminds me when Sallah once said to me: " ???? ??? ??? ???? ??? ????? ???? ?????? ??? ????"

Stock Surge: They're Buying Security and So Is Everyone Else

Palo Alto Networks' stock is up 23% this year pushing their market cap near $120 billion. It seems everyone's buying into the AI security hype. I suppose if you're going to be chased by virtual boulders you might as well have a decent whip. As my father used to say "This is Archaeology!" I wonder what he would have said about this?

May 21st: Judgment Day (for Earnings Reports)

Keep your eyes peeled! Palo Alto Networks reports their third quarter earnings on May 21st. Will they strike gold or will the temple collapse? Only time will tell. But if history teaches us anything it's that there's always another adventure to be had another artifact to find and another cyber threat to outrun. After all as I always say "I'm making this up as I go!"