Fortune and Gasoline! Oil Prices Surge as Mideast Tensions Simmer

That Belongs In A Museum! (Or Maybe A Gas Station)

Right gather 'round you fortune and glory seekers! Yours truly Indiana Jones is here to break down this latest bit of news – a genuine archaeological dig of geopolitical proportions! It seems our friends in the Middle East are at it again and this time it's causing quite the tremor in the global oil market. Oil prices wouldn't you know have jumped like a snake startled by a torch! About 3% if you must know the exact figures. I've seen smaller snakes cause bigger problems believe me.

Netanyahu's Gamble: A Game of Chicken with Ayatollahs

Apparently Prime Minister Netanyahu bless his adventurous heart has ordered the Israeli military to 'intensify attacks' against Iran. Strategic targets government targets the whole shebang! Defense Minister Katz even chimed in promising to 'undermine the ayatollah's regime.' Reminds me of the time I had to undermine a Nazi dig site – only this time instead of priceless artifacts we're talking about the world's black gold! 'Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?' Oh wait wrong story but you get the gist. It's messy and it smells trouble (and potentially gasoline).

Trump Card: To Strike or Not To Strike That Is The Question

And because no international kerfuffle is complete without a bit of Trumpian flair the former President is apparently mulling over a U.S. strike on Iran's nuclear program. 'I may do it I may not do it I mean nobody knows what I'm going to do,' he reportedly said. Cryptic as a hieroglyphic isn't it? But here's the kicker: the White House says he'll decide within two weeks. Two weeks! That's about the same amount of time it takes to decode a really obscure map… or find a decent cup of coffee in Cairo.

OPEC's Woes: When Regimes Fall and Prices Rise

Now the brainiacs at JPMorgan are warning that regime change in Iran – a major oil producer in OPEC mind you – could send global oil prices soaring. And by soaring I mean 'strap yourselves in folks it's gonna be a bumpy ride!' Natasha Kaneva some commodity guru says 'further destabilization of Iran could lead to significantly higher oil prices sustained over extended periods.' Well duh! That's like saying finding the Ark of the Covenant might cause a little excitement. It's stating the obvious but sometimes even the obvious needs a good bullwhip to drive the point home.

The Final Settlement: Buckle Up Buttercup!

So there you have it folks! Oil prices are up tensions are high and the fate of global energy hangs in the balance. It's enough to make you want to ditch your car and take up horseback riding... well almost. All I can say is keep your eyes peeled your wallets ready and maybe start stockpiling those empty gas cans. Because if this situation explodes we're all going to need a little fortune and a whole lot of gasoline!

Next Time I'm Bringing A Hybrid!

Now if you'll excuse me I have a map to decipher a temple to raid and a very strong suspicion that someone's about to try and swindle me out of my gas money. Adventure awaits and so does the potential for a very expensive fill up. This is why I love my job… and why I’m seriously considering investing in a good old fashioned bicycle.