Yabba Dabba Doo! Stocks Shrug Off Iran Rumble, Could Hit Record Highs!

U.S. SMASHES IRAN MARKET YAWNS?

Yabba Dabba Doo! Your pal Fred Flinstone here reporting live from beautiful Bedrock! I gotta tell ya I'm hearin' some crazy talk about what's goin' on in that place they call the 'Middle East.' Seems like the U.S. went and bonked some Iranian sites but get this – the market's just shrugging it off like it's another Tuesday at the quarry! Some fancy pants professor named Jeremy Siegel is saying it's because folks think Iran's further away from makin' a big boom boom. Says it's good for the markets! Good for the markets? Is that like good for my bowling score? I hope so!

LIKE A DIP IN THE TAR PITS FUTURES ARE 'LITTLE CHANGED'

Now I don't know much about these here 'stock futures' but it sounds like somethin' Wilma would make for dinner...if she wanted to give me the yabba dabba doos! Apparently even after all the rock smashing they didn't change much. President Trump says he 'obliterated' them sites and will smash some more if they don't play nice. This Siegel fella says it's like weighing a dino sized steak against a… well a slightly smaller dino sized steak. The good and the bad are both big so they cancel out. Yabba Dabba Doo! That makes as much sense as Mr. Slate giving me a raise!

OH NO YOU DON'T IRAN!

Now here's the tricky part. Everyone's hoping Iran won't go and do somethin' crazy like pickin' a fight they can't win or shutting down some watery road where all the oil travels. If that happens we're all gonna be sayin' 'd'oh!' This could mess up the whole shebang! I'm talkin' no more Dino burgers no more bowling nights and even worse no more peace and quiet!

ROCK SOLID PREDICTIONS OR JUST DINOSAUR DUNG?

But wait there's more! Siegel says if Iran behaves the stock market might just hit record highs in the next few weeks! Record highs! That's like winnin' the Bedrock bowling tournament! He says it's totally doable assuming Iran doesn't throw any rocks in the works. Personally I'm hopin' he's right. Wilma could use a new pearl necklace and maybe a new stone stove and the way things are looking if he is not right I may not be seeing steak for a while.

BEDROCK STEADY AS A STONE (ALMOST)

Since all this started the market's been pretty steady like Dino waiting for his dinner. It's up a bit this month and not far from its all time high. So fingers crossed that things stay that way. And if they do maybe Mr. Slate will finally give me that promotion!

YABBA DABBA DOO OR YABBA DABBA DON'T?

So there you have it folks! The U.S. smacked Iran the market shrugged and we might just see record highs if everyone plays nice. But remember in Bedrock and in the stock market anything can happen. Now if you'll excuse me I hear Wilma callin'. And you know what that means... time for a bronto burger! Yabba Dabba Doo!