BOEING'S CHINA COMEBACK: A THREAT LEVEL MIDNIGHT FOR PAPER COMPANIES!

FALSE! CHINA TAKES DELIVERY!

As Assistant Regional Manager (and volunteer Sheriff's Deputy) of Dunder Mifflin I Dwight K. Schrute am uniquely qualified to report on matters of international trade and aerial superiority. Turns out China a formidable economic power rivaled only by the beet farming community of Schrute Farms will resume taking deliveries from Boeing next month. Kelly Ortberg a leader at Boeing made the announcement. Last month he said that China had paused deliveries but I never believed it this is all part of their plan! As Sun Tzu said “Keep your friends close but your enemies closer”. And what is closer than a Boeing aircraft? Though I must say I was ready to put on my volunteer sheriff's uniform and handle any unrest if this trade war continued!

TRADE WAR SURVIVAL: BEETS VS. AIRPLANES

Boeing's resilience in the face of this so called trade war is commendable though clearly not as impressive as the Schrute Farms beet harvest year after year. Ortberg even mentioned tariffs on imported components. Can you believe it? Tariffs! It's enough to make a man clutch his Flobie Cereal Farms Value Pack. The truth is this: Boeing will get over it. This is a company that has clearly learned from my own experiences in business they will not fall for any Nard Dog shenanigans!

737 MAX PRODUCTION: A WING AND A PRAYER?

The real test will be Boeing's ability to ramp up production of the 737 Max. Ortberg plans to increase production of the Max jets which frankly is about time. Last year there was a door plug issue which if I was the one in charge that would NEVER have happened I would have made sure that door was secured myself! These 'workhorse' planes were capped at 38 per month but they want to ramp up production by the middle of the year. They are talking about 47 a month later this year! Frankly I find the speed underwhelming but I appreciate the level of quality they are trying to obtain!

FAA APPROVAL: DWIGHT'S SAFETY STANDARDS ARE HIGHER

Of course the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) needs to sign off on all of this. The FAA's standards are... acceptable. But let's be honest my personal safety standards are far more rigorous. I inspect every beet for structural integrity before it goes to market. I bet the FAA does not have that level of dedication. This is a company that learned from me. When I am in charge of the paper business there will be no paper jams! Mark my words!

CEO APPLAUSE: THEY NEED TO LISTEN TO DWIGHT SCHRUTE!

Airline executives are apparently applauding Ortberg's leadership. CEOs praise this Ortberg character because he took the reigns last August. That sounds like a long time but it is not to me! I bet I could get this company running in tip top shape within a month! United Airlines CEO Scott Kirby even said Boeing has "turned the corner." But has the paper industry turned the corner? Has anyone thought about the impact of cheap flights on our local business? What about the bears? Beats Bears Battlestar Galactica. It all connects.

PAPER INDUSTRY APOCALYPSE? FALSE!

The supply chain woes limiting deliveries are troubling. But I see a silver lining! Maybe these delays will encourage people to write more letters print more documents and thus buy more paper! It's a win win unless of course the airlines start flying paper airplanes. Then we're all doomed. DOOMED! But even then Schrute Farms will survive. We have beets. And beets are the fuel of champions and the currency of the future. So let Boeing fly its planes but let us never forget the true backbone of this nation: paper. And me Dwight Schrute.