Trump Says 10% Tariff Floor? I've Heard Bigger Numbers Than That!

Ten Percent? That Ain't No 'Parfait' Layer!

Alright alright settle down everybody! Donkey here reporting live from... well wherever Shrek ain't! Apparently this fella Trump he's talking tariffs. Now I ain't no fancy economist but even I know that 10% of somethin' is... well somethin'! He says that's the floor for these tariffs on imports. Floor schmoor! Sounds like he's buildin' a whole new house of economic who ha. Shrek always said 'Ogres are like onions,' but I think economics are like onions too lots of layers and they make you wanna cry!

Massive Surpluses? Sounds Like Somebody's Been Eatin' All the Cake!

So Trump's saying some countries have 'massive trade surpluses' and haven't been treatin' the US of A right. Massive surpluses eh? Sounds like they've been eatin' all the cake! Remember when Lord Farquaad tried to take over Duloc? Same kinda power hungry vibe if you ask me. But don't worry Donkey's here to sniff out the truth... and maybe find some waffles along the way!

UK Gets the 'Good Deal' Stamp of Approval!

Now here's where it gets interesting. Apparently the UK's cuttin' a deal with Trump and he seems pretty happy about it. He says they made a 'good deal' and that they 'always treated us with great respect.' Good for them! Maybe they offered him some tea and crumpets? Shrek always said the way to a man's heart is through his stomach but I think respect and maybe some free waffles wouldn't hurt either.

Is This The Template? Trump Says 'NOOOO!'

A reporter asked the big question: Is this UK deal a 'template' for future trades? And Trump shouted a big loud 'No no.' Just like Shrek when he is trying to scare away those villagers to reclaim his swamp! I am guessing this means every country is gonna have to sing their own tune. Hope they all got a good voice!

Waffles For Everyone!

So what does it all mean? Well I'm just a donkey not a fortune teller. But it sounds like Trump's gonna keep shakin' things up when it comes to trade. Whether that's good or bad I dunno. But I'm hopin' it means more waffles for everyone! 'Cause seriously who doesn't love waffles?

Stay Tuned Folks!

That's all for now folks! Donkey signing off! Remember keep your chin up your tail waggin' and always be ready for a sing along! And if anyone offers you a trade deal make sure you get the waffles first! 'Cause you know what they say 'Nobody move! I got a donkey and I'm not afraid to use him!'