Strait of Hormuz Hullabaloo! GPS Jamming Makes Ships Go 'Doh-Key'!

Hormuz Hiccups: Not the Kind You Get from Too Many Parfaits!

Alright alright settle down ogre achievers! Donkey here your trusty news donkey reporting live from... well not the Strait of Hormuz 'cause that place sounds like a donkey nightmare right now. Apparently there's some serious GPS jamming going on. Angeliki Frangou this big shot shipowner lady says things are getting dicey. Vessels are getting all confused and can't find their way! It's like trying to find your way out of Shrek's swamp blindfolded... only way more important and less likely to involve singalongs.

Ships Playing Hide and Seek: Not a Game People!

So get this. This GPS jamming thingamajig is making ships wait longer to pass through the Strait. Frangou says there's about 20% less ships scooting through there. And those ocean liner companies? They're only transiting during the DAY. Daytime! It's like they're scared of the dark or maybe scared of accidentally ending up in Duloc! Apparently at night things get dangerous and nobody wants to end up lost at sea like Gingy when he lost his gumdrop buttons.

Missing MMSI: It's Like Losing Your Donkey ID!

Now there's all this fancy talk about 'Maritime Mobile Service Identity' or MMSI which I guess is like a ship's donkey license plate. Turns out a bunch of ships seem to have LOST their MMSI... or more likely they're being jammed. Some fancy pants analysis shows ship traffic has plummeted. On June 13 there were 16,127 of these ship thingies. By June 22 that number shrunk more than Pinocchio's nose when he's telling the truth!

Hormuz: The World's Oil and Gas Superhighway!

Okay here's the serious part even for a donkey like me. The Strait of Hormuz is where a HUGE chunk of the world's oil and gas ships go through. We're talking like 20% of the whole shebang! And it's a narrow passage only 21 miles wide at its skinniest part. That's why this GPS jamming is such a big deal. Imagine trying to parallel park a dragon carriage in a space that small... while blindfolded!

Safety First! (Even for Donkeys!)

Frangou keeps saying 'Safety first!' And that's important even for a chatty donkey like myself. This GPS stuff isn't just messing with shipping schedules it's putting crews and vessels in danger! They're watching everything like Shrek watches his swamp… very very carefully. Speaking of Shrek I sure hope he doesn't have to start rationing his swamp gas because of all this!

Cha Ching! Freight Rates Go BOOM!

And here's where it hits your wallet! Because of all this chaos insurance rates and freight rates are going bananas! We're talking a 76% jump on some routes. So if you're shipping something from Shanghai to the UAE it's gonna cost you more than a weekend at a dragon spa! And these experts say once rates go up it's harder than getting Shrek to admit he likes hugs to get them back down.